Sunday, November 02, 2014

I can’t wait for Tuesday

So. Tuesday is Election Day in the U.S…

It’s a chance to remove the current idiots in charge and replace them with a new set of idiots. (Or keep the current set, depending on which side wins.)

I have a set of things that I want our

politicians to care about, which normally aligns me with the Democrats. I’d vote for a Republican if I had to, but they don’t seem to care about the people as much as they say they do.

Currently, every Republican I know has way more money than I do and votes with their wallet.

I vote with my heart… it’s the right thing to do.

This year we have an idiot who couldn’t win in MA a few years ago. He jumped borders because he thinks NH voters may like him better than their neighbours.

I think that’s just bullshit. If he stood for the three things I care about most, I still wouldn’t vote for him. He hasn’t lived here long enough to truly represent my best interests. How does he know what NH needs? HE DIDN’T FUCKING LIVE HERE UNTIL HE LOST THE LAST ELECTION.

Ugh.

The other thing that’s got my knickers in a twist is the amount of calls and mailers we get.

I know who I’m voting for and all the annoying phone calls and shit in my mailbox aren’t going to change my mind.

I really fucking hate Election Day. The only redeeming quality it has is that once it’s over, I get another three years and eight months or so of peace and quiet.

Monday, October 27, 2014

So. That’s that, then.

Hmmmm… I guess I can talk about it. It’s not like it’s not public knowledge.

The work drama has come to an end.

My boss was let go this morning.

I suppose, I can feel relief that my comments to the GM/AGM were not the final nail(s) in the coffin. They’d already started looking for his replacement long before I got the nerve to say something.

A lot of people asked me how I was going to celebrate. A few people congratulated me on my promotion, which was pretty fucked up.

As much as I wish I was getting promoted, I’m happy that we’re getting in a new person who might be better suited for our needs and will take the time to groom me. I’m not ready to be the DoF in our current situation. I mean, I’ve only been there since January and I’ve never had much in the way of ‘real’ training. In fact, towards the end, I was reduced to a mere data-entry clerk.

I owe BK a huge hug and kiss… if he hadn’t let me talk / vent, I’d have been miserable for much longer. As it was, he sent me an email today after the bomb was dropped and asked me how I was doing. He’s good people. I’m glad I get to work with him.

Sunday, October 12, 2014

Feelin’ groovy

It’s amazing how good I feel since my discussion with BK on Friday. (Possibly related, I’ve had a BAD craving for Burger King’s onion rings since Friday. And their chicken fries which aren’t available here! And also missing from their website… Were they blink-and-you’ll-miss-them?)

——

Since hope has been restored, I actually started feeling motivated to pick up my Ukrainian books. The italki October challenge has helped, too, but it’s amazing what can happen when everything is good.

I have to see my drug dealer next weekend and I’m thinking about asking her to adjust my meds. My moods have been out of control recently due to the work stress and I don’t know how much longer I can keep them in check. Not that I’ve been doing a very good job as of right now any way.

I’m also wondering if my pattern of letting work get to me and triggering major depressions is a sign that I need to quit and go on disability. That scares me, though. I was just as bad when I was unemployed and didn’t have anything better to do than write fan fic and play on tumblr.

Maybe I’m just really broken. And unrepairable.

So… meds. Last resort, maybe, but who knows. I’ve been on the same cocktail for years now. My last cocktail failed miserably after a few years and I’ve been on this mix much longer.

——

I wrote a really long, really cathartic entry on my Ukrainian blog, to circle back to the having hope thing. I’ve got plans for that blog in terms of writing in English and Ukrainian and I’m pretty excited. I’m sticking with the old design for now while I figure out if I want to continue to invest the time in the new design. It feels like a stalling tactic. And it probably is.

Also, fucking auto correct keeps insisting that my grandparents’ village was in Turnip, not Ternopil. *sigh*

Absolutely ridiculous.

——

It’s time for my Speaking Bootcamp webinar. Today is about more tricks to retain vocabulary. WOOOOOOOOO!

No. Seriously. I am that excited about it. There just aren’t enough fun learning websites for Ukrainian. Maybe I should go back and do French. Or learn Russian. (HA! NEVER! I shouldn’t even joke about that.)

Friday, October 10, 2014

hockey hockey hockey hockey HOCKEY!!!!!!!

My employer is playing the Assholes from the Hill on teeeeveeee tonight. I’m listening to the school that should have gotten all my money and I’m following the school that did get my money via a college hockey app.

IT’S HOCKEY SEASON!!!!!!!!!!!!!

The buzz in the office was amazing. The first home game of the season. The team’s newest rival in the house. A sell-out (or damn close).

Despite the shit that’s been going on, deep down I do still love where I work very much.

Speaking of… I had a long talk with [someone] about [something] this morning. Things fell into place. The world was set right.

I feel better about things than I have in a long time.

——

I had other things I wanted to talk about, but it all pales in comparison.

I do love me some Burger King. (Not the restaurant, the person who let me vent and let me know I wasn’t alone… who just happened to remind me of a fast-food restaurant.)

——

Thatcher Demko is a fucking sieve tonight which means that this hockey season is off to an awesome start.

Fuck ‘em up! Fuck ‘em up! BC SUCKS!!!!!

Sunday, October 05, 2014

Look at how little he was!

The italki October challenge has begun and I just scheduled the rest of my 12 hours. Thankfully, $20 of those fees were a ‘gift’ from a webinar I signed up for. More importantly, I’ll get back my original pledge plus some extra. It doesn’t make up for the hit on my credit card, but it will help pay for future sessions.

Because, in true me fashion, I decided that the $6/hr tutor wasn’t the right fit to move forward with and the $12/hr one was.

Either way, I’ll get in my 12 hours and will hopefully get somewhere farther than where I am now.

I’m tired of beating myself up about not putting in the time and not putting in the effort… I just need to suck it up and actually DO something. Even if it’s five minutes a day.

That said, do you think I did my homework from Wednesday yet? For Monday’s class? 

Nope.

——

That webinar I mentioned is actually a speaking ‘bootcamp”. It’s main purpose is to help us find the right fit for speaking partners by helping us really narrow down what we want and making that clear to the people on the different conversation exchange sites. So far, I’ve gotten some good ideas for my profile, some decent tricks to reduce the stage fright, and a list of phrases to translate, like “I don’t understand”. (Я не розумію - I’m a pro at that one!) Is it worth the money? It wasn’t too expensive, but I probably could have found the same information for free on the web. Eh, I wanted to be spoon fed and he’s doing it. (Plus, British accent!)

Sadly, I’m more likely to do his homework (send him a list of those phrases - I don’t understand, could you please speak slowly, etc) than I am the italki tutor’s one because I’ve already learned those phrases.

——

I never heard back from the second immigration law firm.

I don’t know what to do to move forward, except literally move. Five years in Ukraine in order to get a passport? Seems easier every day.

——

In more news, J got a new car this weekend. (His was paid off, too, so why not? *sigh*)

An orange Crosstrek. ORANGE!

We’re on our third Subaru each, so I guess we’re a Subaru family after all.

——

And now… it’s time for ice cream!

(Or морозиво if you really want to know what it is in Ukie.)