Saturday, June 01, 2013

Here’s to good friends

there are so many good things about this picture, i can’t even…

Went out to lunch today with Silent P.

I can’t remember the last time I braved Portsmouth during tourist season, but it wasn’t too bad today.

We went to the Gas Light and - once again - they proved my theory that I’ve only ever crossed paths with one chef who can cook a burger to order. It’s not rocket science. I can’t cook, but if I did, I’m sure I could figure it out. I’m a whiz at baking and baking is harder, so therefore, poking a burger to make sure it matches the “fist test” can’t be that hard.

Actually, the guy that taught me the fist test just happens to be the only one that can cook a burger…

Interesting.

Anyhoo.

After we ate, we walked around the city. I forget how beautiful it can be around there. It’s like Boston, but smaller. Much easier to trip over the tourists.

We bonded over the weirdest things. He really is a kindred spirit in so many ways.

I’m bummed I left the Muchachos because it means I don’t get to see him too often, but I’m glad he wants to continue the friendship outside of the corps.

Rebuilding a life is hard - especially when you’re the one who nuked it - but it is possible.

Thanks for reminding me of that, Silent P.

 

Wednesday, May 29, 2013

What is WRONG with people these days?!?

mmmmm… benedork cucumberpatch

OK… this one is all R2D2’s fault. (Yeah, it’s growing on me.)

I *should* be researching/prepping for my two interviews tomorrow. But instead, I’m reading copious amounts of “Cabin Pressure” fan fic. (Research!!! Honest.)

R2’s reaction to proofreading my Johnlock fan fic has really brought on a huge happy which is diminishing the fear of making a bad job mistake:
I will be honest I haven’t finished it, but I think you are fooling yourself. You have the enthusiasm, more than I do that’s for certain, and the chops, you just need a little refining, and maybe a little more focus. Just constructive criticism. If writing is your passion, (which from what I read it clearly is) then what the eff are you waiting for? An invitation? Nobody’s going to give you one. In this business you have to go out and take it.

The problem with reading CP fan fic is that Martin’s character is such a sad sack that it’s really hard to make him even more pathetic. However, head canon within the fandom is FULL of different versions of Martin!Whump (those two words can be combined in any order, I guess, but at the end of the day, whump is whump). I guess he needs a ridiculous amount of whump in his life to make Marlas so believable? I don’t know… I’m having the same problems with Marlas as I do with certain versions of Johnlock head canon. But even Marthur drives me up the wall.  I get that Martin needs to be rescued - from himself, from life in general - but there’s no need to take such a pathetic person and have to give him such an appalling back story, no matter who comes to rescue him.

The other thing that REALLY bothers me is Cabinlock (Sherlock/Cabin Pressure). Honestly, I can handle the thought of wincest better than I can handle thinking about Cabinlock. The idea of Martin (gingerbatch) getting it on with Sherlock (brunettebatch) is… what was the word I used earlier? Squitchy. Yeah. Squitchy times a billion infinities.

I guess since the muse gave me a great idea in the shower this morning, I’m going to start writing it… but I’m going to have to charge off in my own direction again. Sometimes, I’m a little surprised by my fellow fans, and I really didn’t think there was anything left that could surprise me…

Monday, May 27, 2013

The writing bug

sometimes, the jokes write themselves

If he’s not the most adorkable thing you’ve ever seen, then I don’t know if we can be friends.

——

I reread my Johnlock fan fic this morning, and I still really like it. That’s a first. Normally, after a NaNo, I’ll try to pick the story up so I can end it. I cringe at every single word in those 50K monsters. Every. Single. Word. Sometimes, I like the general idea of the story and I’ll try to rewrite it, but… Anne Lamont says you’re supposed to write a shitty first draft. That that’s completely fine. But what happens if you write something WORSE than a shitty first draft?

I am the Queen of the Worst-Than-Shitty-First-Draft.

Which is exactly why nothing I write for fun ever gets finished.

Which is exactly why I like the idea of writing for a living, but know it will never happen.

I’m OK with that. There were a lot of things I wanted to be when I grew up: a veterinarian, an Olympic gymnast, a fire man, a boy, a writer, normal.

I think it’s safe to say that I’m none of that.

Except I guess I’m technically a writer - writers write and I definitely write. Here, there, everywhere. The journals I’ve kept my entire life. My blogs. Stories. But not for profit, and I’ve always considered a writer someone who gets paid. So yeah, not a writer.

Anyhoo.

Now that I’ve actually written something I like, I want to write more.

Specifically fan fic.

It’s easier to play in someone else’s sandbox than to have to build your own. Everything you need is there: a world, characters, situations. You just need to know your characters inside and out. (Hence, the thousands of viewings of Sherlock during my leisure hours. It’s a good thing I really like the show. *grin*)

I suppose now the issue is whether or not I want to continue writing Johnlock or if I want to move on to something else.

If that’s the toughest choice I have to make right now, today, I guess that’s a good thing.

If not a little pathetic.

Sunday, May 26, 2013

Five hour lunch

yeah, kripke. don’t think we don’t know what you do in your free time!

Remember the days when fandoms were exclusive clubs and the show runners and actors had no idea what the fuck was going on?

*shakes fist at the internet*

——

I went out to lunch today with a woman I used to work with in a previous life. She’s kind of like a surrogate mom to me. (Her daughters are my age, so it’s not so farfetched an idea… and she would have LOVED my father.) As we do, we talked, and talked, and talked. About everything and about nothing. It was nice. I needed some ‘mom’ time and it’s been over a year. Stoopid life kept getting in the way. On both sides.

I talked about my issues with interviewing for the job at Sig Sauer and why I don’t have an opinion on gun control. We talked about gay marriage, abortion… weird shit that we normally don’t talk about, but I opened the door to that when I mentioned the interview with the political place. 

We talked a lot about my job search and how I might have a chance to work for a CPA firm again… she thinks I should get my CPA license. I’m still not sure that’s what I want to do, but it would make my job search easier. It’s one of the biggest things I’m missing on my resume. *sigh* I have the education requirement. I need the work hours and I need to pass a four part exam. (I couldn’t even get myself to take the two part CMA exam and I really want my CMA more than I want my CPA.) Two years at a CPA firm. I’m pretty sure my first year at HWG doesn’t count, and even if it did I’d probably let it slide just so I could have consecutive years.

OK. That last sentence pretty much proves I’m screwed in the head.

That or the fact that I would work two years, get licensed and start looking for a job again that’s NOT in public accounting…

*sigh*

Here’s where my hunt is at so far:

1) CPA firm mentioned above - Tony the Pimp says they want to meet me this week.

2) Collection law firm - interview on Wednesday

3) Payroll funding place - my resume is being passed on to the controller. I think I’m too expensive.

4) Political place - hoping to hear back this week. Already did an email interview and a phone screen.

5) Retirement community - hoping to hear back this week. Already did a phone screen.

6) IT company - hoping to hear back. They were the other one with the email interview questions, and a web survey.

Out of all of them, I think I’d like to work at the political place the most… but I don’t know if I should. It’s in Boston - an 80 minute train ride from Newburyport, which is about a half hour from here. And that’s one way! *sigh* There’s no way in hell I’d be able to find a place to park near Downtown Crossing, plus you couldn’t pay me enough to commute into the city by car.

I have no fucking idea what to do. I suck at looking for jobs.

——

I posted this on Facebook last week:

Netflix: Because you watched [really crappy horror movie]... here’s Dirty Dancing and What to Expect When You’re Expecting.

Me: I can’t argue with that logic.

I now have two friends in a gross-out competition. Right now, it’s tied one-all. I’m not sure what’s worse: that they found something even more upsetting than Ron Jeremy’s killer penis movie or that I’m amused enough by this to make it a competition and keep score. 

——

I don’t think there’s any more I can do with my Johnlock fic so it’s on it’s way to the proofreader. I’m so nervous! It was weird when I made J read it, and now it’s in the hands of a friend of a friend.

I think I want to puke.

That would be exactly why I DON’T write for a living.

Friday, May 24, 2013

My little baby is about to go out in the world.

dog bless the person that grabbed this

OK - first the important news.

I’ve got an interview on Wednesday. My recruiters are picking up steam.

I’ve also played the “I’ve been laid off” card and negotiated a lower cable bill and an extension on my IMA membership. I’m trying to figure out who else I can negotiate a lower rate with… but in the meantime, the resume’s going out and the calls are coming in. Can’t ask for more than that.

——

My JohnLock fic is finally ready to get posted on FFN, but I wanted a proofreader. J is reading it, but I don’t know if I’ll get an honest opinion out of him. I don’t think I’m going to look for a beta. As far as I can tell, betas are usually good for making sure every one stays in character plus doing the usual proofreading. Since I’m using my own head canon and my personal experiences, they’re going to be a little out of character. I’m fine with that because I’ve tried to keep them as close as possible but they’re going to veer off course.

So, I asked my new friend to proofread it. It’s scary, but he’s a very good outside opinion. I don’t think he’d sugar coat his review like Rollz’ might have and definitely not like J will.

Brit-picking is something else entirely. I have a few British friends I can ask to read it, but since I’m a little nervous about putting it out in the world of people I know, I’m going to stick to the excuse that I’m an American. Plus, the more “British” fan fic I’ve read lately (both Cabin Pressure and Sherlock fan fic are based on BBC programs), the more obvious it is that the majority of Americans don’t do a whole lot of research. I know it’s really bad when *I* can brit-pick them. It’s called Google, people!!!! (And really, the last time I checked, Regent’s Park was the closest to Baker St., not Hyde Park. There’s also the small fact that a walk to Buckingham Palace from Baker St is about 45 minutes. 10 or so by cab, but they walked there (Mapquest has the UK in their database and you can get walking directions.)  The sad (good?) thing is that I actually knew those facts without having to look them up. I double checked, of course, but for once, the little voices in my head were right. 

I’m NEVER going to pretend I’m an expert, though, and my author’s note will probably reflect that fact.

I just need to export it from Storyist to Word and email it off.

My baby is finally leaving the nest…