Friday, November 08, 2013

Text messages worth keeping

My favourite Buckeye fan: You know I love ya, ya crazy ass

Me: I think you meant to say crazy assHOLE. Wouldn’t want people to think I’m going soft in my old age.

Me: There’s a dick joke in there somewhere.

My favourite Buckeye fan: There’s always a dick joke in there somewhere ha ha

Me: Seeing how I’ve been writing pr0n all day, it’s more like there’s always a dick somewhere!

Me: Rule # 4 of NaNo: When in doubt, write pr0n.

Me: Susie sat on the edge of the bed and licked her lips when Johnny pulled out his ding dong. “Oh, baby, I want that in my mouth.”

Me: He pulled the chocolatey treat out of its wrapper and gently placed it in her mouth. “Oh, baby, that tastes so good!”
Ed. note: this was supposed to refer to the yummy Hostess Ding Dong.

Me: What? Food pr0n is still pr0n. LMAO.

Me: So, when I told my personal trainer about the food pr0n, she thought I was referring to a black guy. EVEN BETTER!

Yup. I’ve officially lost my mind. How many days left? *grin*

I’m so going to hell… according to a number of sources.

Speaking of fan fic:

One of the unspoken ‘rules’ of NaNoWriMo is “When in doubt, write pr0n.”

You would think that with the amount of boy/boy pr0n I read (and yes, I do read a little Sherlolly from time to time as a palate cleanser), I would be able to write it.

Um, NO. No, no, no, no, no, no, NO. I cannot write boy on boy for the life of me.

I suck so hard at it that it’s not even funny. It’s quite painful, really.

(Take that sentence as you may…)

——

OK. So.

I turned down an offer today from what essentially became my second choice. I really feel like I need to wait for the other company to invite me back for a second interview. This is now the second company I’ve walked away from this week. I’m not going to make a whole lot of money at the temp job, but it should keep us afloat for a bit longer.

ARGH! This is so hard!!!!

This other company better be worth the wait…

——

According to the Church of Christ on Rt. 1, “Life without God is like an unsharpened pencil: No point.”

As a long time believer in alternate religions and periodically identifying as an agnostic, I have a huge problem with this. I like how my life has been marginalized and has apparently been wasted. I get that it’s a church sign and that they’re entitled to their point of view, but OUCH! I totally believe in their right to post what they want on their road sign, but on the flip side, I’m going to exercise my right to call them out on their douchebaggery.

I can’t believe the Great and Powerful Oz would actually ask his followers to belittle others’ beliefs. What happened to ‘judge not lest ye be judged’? Isn’t that their thing? Like the Wiccans have the Rule of Three? It’s just ridiculous that my life is written off / has no point because I don’t believe in their pre-packaged, sanitized for the masses, Dog.

Grrrr….