When it rains, it pours…

giggly freebatch

OK. Let’s recap:

1) Politcal group: NO

2) Tax software group: NO, NO, NO, NO (Dog bless that guy, he kept throwing positions at me all day. Unfortunately, they were all bad fits. *sigh)

3) Widget maker: guaranteed 2nd interview

4) Hotel: first interview on phone on the way back from the widget place turned into 2nd interview tomorrow

That was today… doesn’t even take into account the guaranteed 2nd interview from Wednesday’s meeting with the place that does the thing.

The best part, is that all 3 positions I have 2nds for need to hire ASAP.

I’ve never been in the position where I get to choose from multiple places all at the same time…

Damn. It feels good.

——

OK. I have to fan girl. Sorry!

Someone asked me why I was so laser focused on Benedistraction Cutiepatch. He’s not necessarily “hot”, although I do find him easy on the eyes… but the more I dig into his work, the more his talent blows me away. And let’s not even bring up his personality! The more interviews, etc., I see with him, the more I’m convinced that he’s a five year old in a 36 year old’s body. (C’mon! That adorkable man is hard to NOT love.)

Atonement, Tinker Tailor Soldier Spy, The Other Boleyn Girl - all period dramas, smaller parts, but he’s very good.

Star Trek Into Darkness - he plays the bad boy extremely well

Sherlock - the purple shirt of sex MUST be mentioned, but the way he brings Sherlock to life… you can see character growth there over the two series.

Neverwhere - radio show based on a Gaiman story, his voice! The amount of creepy that he pulls off as the angel Islington is enough to give me the heebie-jeebies. And he did it without any vocal effects.

Cabin Pressure - also a radio show, his comedic timing and the way he brings his character to life… I haven’t seen actors who can pull off the range of emotion he can in a simple sentence.

The man is pure talent with a voice that… mmmm… and well, the rest of the package ain’t so bad neither.

OK. Fan girling over… time to research for tomorrow’s interview.

Welcome back, panic attacks. I’ve missed you!

unf

The political group decided I wasn’t a good fit (no management experience).

The tax software group decided to hire from within… then, their recruiter let me know about a collections position that just came upon his desk. I am absolute shite at doing collections. I HATE asking people for money. It’s why I don’t work for myself… Passed that one up without a second thought.

Got an offer to interview for a decent position but it’s temp. With a possibility of temp-to-perm. I don’t have the emotional strength to even attempt something like that. What if it doesn’t work out? Then I have a string of temp to perm jobs that I couldn’t last at… eventually, I’ll have to throw those on my resume and I don’t want to. It’s bad enough I outgrow positions quickly and jump to something new within a year or two… now I’d have to explain a month here, a few months there, here a month, there a month, everywhere a month month. Tam sucks at finding work. E-I-E-I-O

Ah, the depressed phase of a bipolar cycle + panic attacks + an interview in an hour.

This is *so* not going to end well.

Whoops

someone else feels the same way i do!

I’m beyond gobsmacked. This is exactly how my Johnlock ends (well, kinda…). I want to know who is behind this and just love them, and hug them, and name them George. Although in my version Sherlock “proposes” (if you can call it that) instead of having Mycroft do it while John’s in Dublin. (Is that even possible? I thought both parties had to be there. Oh well, it IS Mycroft. Anything’s possible when you run the British Government.)

——

As I was putting my thank you notes in the mail for yesterday’s interviews, it dawned on me that I didn’t even bother to shoot off a quick email to any one who drove me nuts with the email interviews, web surveys, and phone screens. Part of me wonders if that’s borderline unprofessional and part of me wonders if I should even care. They’re “just” phone screens. The people I’m talking to have absolutely nothing more to do with the hiring process after making sure I’m still OK to pass on to the hiring manager. It’s a hard decision to make… but my guts say that most of the companies screening me just want to know what my salary requirements are and whether or not I’m interested in the commute. I don’t know if that justifies a thank you. What would I write? “Thank you for spending five minutes on the phone with me and then getting upset when I tell you that I’m over the range you want to pay.”

*sigh*

I don’t know… this job market sucks and I don’t want to look bad, but I just can’t get motivated to care enough to write even a one second email to someone who really has nothing to do with whether or not I get hired.

Oh well. It’s time to research for my next interview and then hit the road. When I get back, it’s time to start looking for some new places. If only to hit my quota with unemployment.

*double sigh*

Have I mentioned how much I absolutely hate being on a forced, unpaid vacation?

What is WRONG with people these days?!?

mmmmm… benedork cucumberpatch

OK… this one is all R2D2’s fault. (Yeah, it’s growing on me.)

I *should* be researching/prepping for my two interviews tomorrow. But instead, I’m reading copious amounts of “Cabin Pressure” fan fic. (Research!!! Honest.)

R2’s reaction to proofreading my Johnlock fan fic has really brought on a huge happy which is diminishing the fear of making a bad job mistake:
I will be honest I haven’t finished it, but I think you are fooling yourself. You have the enthusiasm, more than I do that’s for certain, and the chops, you just need a little refining, and maybe a little more focus. Just constructive criticism. If writing is your passion, (which from what I read it clearly is) then what the eff are you waiting for? An invitation? Nobody’s going to give you one. In this business you have to go out and take it.

The problem with reading CP fan fic is that Martin’s character is such a sad sack that it’s really hard to make him even more pathetic. However, head canon within the fandom is FULL of different versions of Martin!Whump (those two words can be combined in any order, I guess, but at the end of the day, whump is whump). I guess he needs a ridiculous amount of whump in his life to make Marlas so believable? I don’t know… I’m having the same problems with Marlas as I do with certain versions of Johnlock head canon. But even Marthur drives me up the wall.  I get that Martin needs to be rescued - from himself, from life in general - but there’s no need to take such a pathetic person and have to give him such an appalling back story, no matter who comes to rescue him.

The other thing that REALLY bothers me is Cabinlock (Sherlock/Cabin Pressure). Honestly, I can handle the thought of wincest better than I can handle thinking about Cabinlock. The idea of Martin (gingerbatch) getting it on with Sherlock (brunettebatch) is… what was the word I used earlier? Squitchy. Yeah. Squitchy times a billion infinities.

I guess since the muse gave me a great idea in the shower this morning, I’m going to start writing it… but I’m going to have to charge off in my own direction again. Sometimes, I’m a little surprised by my fellow fans, and I really didn’t think there was anything left that could surprise me…

*squee*

i can’t believe how true this comment is…

My interview this morning was with a company I was a little, um, squitchy over. I wasn’t sure it was going to be a good place to work because I’d heard some bad things about the amount of turnover and they don’t advertise/have a website. How am I supposed to interview with only a job description? I don’t like going in blind.

I’m happy about the interview - and I was pretty much guaranteed a second - but there’s that little voice in my head that’s saying “DANGER! WILL ROBINSON! DANGER! DANGER!” I had an idea about how badly the temp-to-perm disaster affected me, but apparently I’m doubting EVERYTHING. It’s like I’m afraid to have an offer extended to me because I’m terrified to make the wrong choice again.

The guys I spoke with were pretty detailed over WHY there was so much turnover in the accounting department. I didn’t even have to bring it up. We talked about the bad google search results, but I expected their responses based on the industry they’re in. It’s kind of like working for a restaurant - only the people they piss off talk about their experiences. This company’s industry is all about pissing people off. Seriously. Oddly enough, I’m OK with that. I know what they do. I know how it works. I’m not surprised by the amount of people they piss off. (Honestly, I’d be shocked if people were all, “OMG! I lurve them! I had the best experience! They were so gentle when they cut my fingers off!” OK. Gross exaggeration…)

There’s a lot to like about the position. Pay. Commute. People. Possibilities to grow. Dress code. Hours. A whole lot. Did I mention the salary and flexible hours? I love the idea that I’m on the low end of what they’re offering. LOW END. And that I can be in at 7 and out at 3. Who wouldn’t, right?

It’s not an international company, though. I do have an interview with one tomorrow though… also close to home.

I don’t know. I’m still waiting to hear from other companies I think I’d like to work for.

As much as I don’t want to be unemployed, I’m also not sure I’m ready to take another job.

I wish I knew how to get past my fear…