FUCKING SNOW. WHAT THE FUCK.

sorry, bro

I was supposed to go to work today.

SUPPOSED TO.

Don’t get me wrong, I do love me a good snow storm, but NOT ON MY FIRST DAY OF WORK.

(Dude, the internet needs a better way to portray anger.)

I work for a state university (on paper, I guess… I don’t know how this all works.) and it’s closed today because of the weather. Rumour has it the world will be shut down again tomorrow.

SO I MAY NOT GET TO START WORK AT ALL THIS WEEK

Motherfucker.

S’OK though… I have a DVR’d copy of “The Empty Hearse” I can watch! That’ll keep me busy for about an hour and a half. I have three iTunes movie rentals, too. So It’s not like I have stuff I can do. (And I suppose I should shovel…)

But I really wanted to go to work today.

Plus, in the shower, I got the idea on how to start / tweak that idea I had for the Johnlock fan fic. I started working on that while I was fucking around with the DVR… and it seems to be coming along OK so far.

******SHERLOCK SPOILERS****** (you have been warned)

yep. mofftiss trolls tumblr

I will be watching it again. Several times. Probably starting tomorrow night.

I don’t even know where to start…

1) Anderson ships Sherlolly - and OMG. THAT FUCKING KISS. Loo is one lucky girl.

2) Mrs. Hudson ships Johnlock like a fucking beast. Not that that’s news or anything. (Although, really Mofftiss - was John’s outburst COMPLETELY necessary? You gave us Sheriarty and Sherlolly. Couldn’t we just have one little Johnlock moment? Oh wait…)

3) Fan club girl ships Sheriarty, and damn if that scene on the rooftop wasn’t brilliant. Do you think that Benedict turned Andrew Scott gay? (Benedict!Sexual is now a thing…)

4) We all got the squash ball right!

5) And the fact that Sherlock’s landing was hidden from John via the small building in the foreground (Ambulance station).

6) Fucking Mofftiss gave us three possible solutions to The Fall. No idea which was the real one…

7) Benedict’s parents. BENEDICT’S. PARENTS.

8) Mycroft and Sherlock playing Operation. And that line about the goldfish… (Mystrade, anyone?)

*breathes*

9) “I don’t shave for Sherlock Holmes.” Yes, you do. Don’t lie, Jawn.

10) HAROLD’S GONE. Buh-bye mournstache.

11) The off switch.

12) John’s reaction was perfect. Not like in ACD canon…

13) He kept hearing John’s voice in his head and John attacked a patient that he thought was Sherlock. (Shout out to ACD canon right there.)

14) “And in that moment, I swear we were all Anderson” Yes. Yes, we were.

15) John’s blog. I fucking died when I read the comments. (We are not talking about the mustache.)

16) John Watson flips the bird. To the camera. (How much do you want to be that gets edited out in the American broadcast?)

17) The “Lazarus” code word - Gatiss wrote the episode. Gatiss was in Who as… yep.

18) Sherlock’s french accent… all he needed was a fucking egg whisk and the entire CabinLock fandom would have died.

19) In a weird twisted way, the entire episode was a shout out to Johnlock. No. Seriously. Despite John’s fucking outburst, there’s no doubt that there’s a very deep, very loving relationship between the men. It’s just platonic.

20) I FUCKING LOVE AMANDA AS MARY. I do. I really do.

I am absolutely dying over here.

Seriously.

OK. I need to go watch it again. Right. Now.

Bye!

Be prepared and be clean in word and deed…

I think we’ve all come to the conclusion by now that I not clean in word nor deed.

I also can’t solicit for my sister. Not only is it not nice, but I don’t have one. *sigh*

Sherlock starts in 14 minutes. FOURTEEN.

I have a live stream running, I’ve got an active connection to a slingbox (which is acting stupid at the moment), and an account on Filmon TV all live and set to go. (Filmon also has a DVR option…)

I can’t remember the last time I was this prepared for anything. Not even an exam.

Obligatory NYE post

sherlock returns tomorrow!

Last year, my #threewords were self, create, and family.

I think I did well -

SELF: despite being unemployed for most of the year, and dealing with a serious, debilitating, case of depression, there were days when I was able to pull myself out of it and function.

There were also days when I excelled at being a functional human, despite The Ick.

This was probably the worst bipolar / depression episode I’ve ever had, if only because of the length of time it lasted. 

But I survived it, no matter how hard it was to remember that depression lies.

CREATE: I published four pieces of fan fic on AO3. While I’m not a superstar, I’ve gotten some kudos, some nice comments, and a proofreader out of it. If I grow some balls, I might even have a brit-picker.

And I’m still writing - I have a Cabin Pressure 30 Day OTP Challenge I’m struggling with, the NaNoWriMo Case Fic / Johnlock disaster that really needs some serious editing, the Sherlock 30 Day OTP Challenge I started as a warm up to NaNo, and I’ve got an idea for another Johnlock fic that I toyed with a long time ago. It never came to fruition because I didn’t know the best way to handle it. After reading a similar Cabin Pressure fic, everything clicked and I can see that those first two pages have a lot of promise.

I didn’t do nearly as much photography as I wanted to, and I never learned how to sew, but I think the amount I wrote more than makes up for it. I also got some quality knitting done, so all things considered, “create” was probably my most successful word.

FAMILY: I spent a lot of time with my Albany family and managed to expand it. I knit a sweater for L. I managed to create/strengthen relationships with high school and college friends that previously didn’t exist in anything similar to their current form. I let go of close friends that I considered family when their behavior turned toxic.

... and finally, oddly, I managed to piss off a member of my family with my deeply rooted belief that I am Polish. Only the National Archives in Warsaw know for sure… but I’m still holding out hope.

This year, I’m not sure what my three words should be. I have a rough idea, but I don’t know if these three are final yet.

I came up with the lame “happy/happiness” for the first one. (At least I think it’s lame - the word, not the idea behind it.)  I want to focus on doing more things that make me happy. Whether that’s to write more, spend more time with my family, get my ass to London at least for a visit, stay at the new job, continue to embrace the SuperWhoLock family and the friends I made there, I just want to do the stupid little things that make me happy. I spent too much of 2013 feeling like a victim, “suffering” from the bipolar and really letting it define who I was. That’s not really something I’m proud of - and while the bipolar is something I’ll always have to deal with - I handled it poorly this year, despite my few victories.

The second one would have to be “travel”. I want to visit far away places this year (London, obviously), but there are places closer to home to see as well. I really want to play tour guide when my friend from Cincy finally gets her ass to the East Coast, and sometimes there’s nothing better than being a tourist in your own town. I’d like to spend more time with Black Mountain Symphony. I’d like to spend more time in Connecticut with my friends and family there.

I think the third one has to be “J”. This year has been super rough on both of us, and I know I’ve taken advantage of his kindness and patience several hundred thousand times.  Part of me couldn’t help it (unfortunately, the depression really forced him to step up and be a grown up which I hated), and part of me just watched as he did things that I was going to do later that day, and part of me tried to make up for it in stupid little ways that aren’t nearly enough. He’s been my rock through everything that’s happened since January 1998 and I can’t imagine my life without him, so it’s probably time that I let him know that I’m sorry for 2013 and 2014 will be a better year for us. My biggest fear is that I’ll lose him. There’s only so much crap I can put him through before he gets fed up, right? Shit, I hated myself for most of this year. I don’t know how or why he’s still around… I would have left me a long time ago.

No - there hasn’t been any sign of things going that bad between us, but it’s a very real fear that’s taken root lately. He really is the Hubby of Wonder because I wonder every day why he’s still here.

These kind of overlap with last year’s, but I’m OK with that.

Happy end of 2013, everyone… may 2014 give you everything your heart desires.

 

Deconstructing Baskerville (BBC Sherlock)

you went on the tube like that? none of the cabs would take me

Watched “Baskerville” last night.

I’ve brought up how Sherlock essentially grows through the six episodes of series one and two, and Baskerville is a great example of that.

He really pisses John off / hurts his feelings when he tells John that he doesn’t have friends. After realising what he did, he tells John that he doesn’t have friends. He’s just got one. The old Sherlock (series one) wouldn’t have paid attention to John’s reaction, wouldn’t have cared. In Baskerville, while freaking out about the hound, he also says the line that, more than anything, sets up the dramatic events in “Reichenbach”:

I’ve always been able to keep myself distant. Divorce myself from feelings. But you see? Body’s betraying me. Interesting, yes? Emotions. The grease on the lenses. The fly in the ointment.

That line is made all the more poignant when John accuses him of being a machine right before the face off with Moriarty on the roof of Bart’s:

Sherlock: What is it?
Watson: Paramedics. Mrs. Hudson’s been shot.
Sherlock: What. How.
Watson: Probably one of the killers you managed to attract. Jesus. Jesus. She’s dying. Sherlock, let’s go.
Sherlock: You go, I’m busy.
Watson: Busy?
Sherlock: Thinking. I need to think.
Watson: You need to— Doesn’t she mean anything to you? You once half-killed a man because he laid a finger on her.
Sherlock: She’s my landlady.
Watson: She’s dying you machine! Sod this. Sod this, you stay here if you want. On your own.
Sherlock: Alone is what I have. Alone protects me.
Watson: No. Friends protect people.

In the end, when it really matters (or is too late to matter, depending), John finally calls Sherlock his ‘friend’. This is significant, because in BBC canon, that’s the first time he does. That’s before he learns that Sherlock jumped to save him from a sniper’s bullet. The scene takes on a life of its own when you see Sherlock in the cemetery watching John grieve over an empty grave. He protected John because John’s his friend.

Emotion

The feels.

It’s stuff like that makes it easy to ship Johnlock, whether it’s in a brOTP or in PWP: the man that doesn’t show emotion gives in, becomes human, because of a person who is everything he isn’t. Despite everything Sherlock has put him through, he is loyal to the end. The very, bitter, end. 

Just like the RAMC motto: In Arduus Fidelis (Faithful in Adversity)

#IBelieveinSherlockHolmes