Catching up…

aaron :: storrs, ct :: march 27, 2009

Wow.  It’s been a while. 

I have a good excuse!  Honest.  It’s called burning the candle at both ends with a sleep over at the hospital.

So, on my actual birthday, Instrument played an acoustic set on UConn’s radio station, WHUS.  I was promised a shout-out by Ben, the lead singer, so I couldn’t wait to hear the show. Seriously excited.  The show went weird… I don’t know how else to describe it… and the shout-out was never done.  I did get a phone call, though, from Ben, apologizing.  We had a great talk - I am completely sincere when I say that he is my most favorite band member. I may have known Derek longer, but Ben and I *totally* bonded.

Saturday, I went to the “Twilight” DVD release party at Michele’s. Not a huge “Twilight” fan - I read all the books, but didn’t really enjoy them. I totally would have hated the movie, except everyone there had seen it a few times and MST3K’d it.  AWESOME! There were inappropriate pictures taken with the cardboard cut-out of Edward, inappropriate things cut into the rice krispies treats, inappropriate comments about boxes,  and PONY! made an appearance… awesome night.  I wasn’t sure I’d have that much fun, but seriously? My friends NEVER disappoint. I’m very fortunate.

Came home on Sunday and planned a totally lazy day.  Not moving off the couch lazy.  Around 4 PM, my heart started beating irregularly.  It does this from time to time, so I wasn’t too concerned.  When it didn’t settle down, we went to the ER.  My heart didn’t want to calm down at all and fought everything the hospital threw at it.  Eventually, it did get back to normal, but after that, they wanted me to stay for observation.  Whatever it is, it’s minor and they weren’t that concerned.  Both relieved and a little freaked out. 

Thursday, I drove back to CT to see Instrument at the Hungry Tiger.  During the soundcheck, Ben serenaded me with “happy birthday”, but it was the extended remix version where he mispronounced my name in every single way possible. It was cute.  I liked that he remembered… even if I was totally obnoxious about my birthday in the days leading up to it. (Remember, this birthday had to be awesome to reduce the effect of March 18’s massively disturbing milestone.) 

Jersey, Boski and Viz were all there.  Henry the hippie even showed up! I didn’t really get a chance to talk to him, but Viz and I did at least get over there and say “hi”. He’s a cool guy and gives a heck of a massage. I seriously wanted to take him home with me.  He needs to friend me on Facebook (AHEM!) since I forgot to get his last name.

Ben tossed a pick at me and also gave me a real birthday shout-out towards the end of their set.  I felt like the uber-groupie.  Wicked fun for a change since I was starting to feel like one of the boys.  Not that that normally bothers me as a rule, but I *am* more than a friend, a roadie and a photographer. It’s nice when they remember I’m a fan as well.

I ended up taking Jersey up to Storrs after the show so he could get his car.  It was nice to get alone time with him and catch up. It’s been too long. Since I was in Storrs anyway, I spent the night at Derek’s. Before we went our separate ways (he to his room, me to his couch), we also had a really great chat.  That was nice, too. Answered some important questions about certain historical issues such as the “spiderman” incident.  I remember that night just as clearly, but not what started the spiderman thing.  He was so detailed that I knew it was indeed me, but I seriously don’t have a freaking clue about anything else.

I hung around D’s all day Friday since I had nothing better to do until the CD release show at Hot Topic.  While I was there, I got to enjoy solo sets by both Jonah and Aaron as we hung around outside.  Then, I got to watch the band practice their acoustic set.  They were so on yesterday.  Even though they were screwing around during rehearsal, they still nailed it.  I couldn’t wait to get to the mall and see it for real. 

They totally rocked the CD release gig.  I’ve seen them have fun on stage before, but their vibe was just insane.  Like I said, they were tight.  It might have been their best show yet. I just don’t have the words for it.  Nice to run into Derek’s parents again and hang out with Michele, Viz, and Jersey.  (Two nights of Jersey! w00t!)

After the show, we had to feed the Vizma and wound up at PF Chang’s.  Our waiter has become the gold standard against which all other men will forever be judged. (Seriously, boyfriend was HOT.) Good time, good food, good conversation.  I wasn’t going to stay for dinner, but I’m glad I did. 

I’ve got a lazy day today and then, I’m off bright and early to meet up with the boys and head to NYC for their show at Arlene’s Grocery.  I’m excited to go.  I haven’t been to NYC in years - don’t really like the city - but I don’t have to drive, so I’m happy.  I can’t wait to see them play again.  It’s been a good weekend so far for them.  I’m so proud of them.  Like I told D Thursday night, there’s no way I’d be driving from NH to CT as much as I have been for their gigs if I didn’t like their music. They’ve really come a long way.

If you haven’t yet (why not?!?), check them out:   Instrument on MySpace.

Off to grab a quick nap before the BU/Ohio State game.  See ya’ll later!

Happy birthday to me!

Had a freaking BLAST in CT last night.  The boys of Instrument got my birthday off to a rockin’ start. Literally. 

I got to spend time with some good friends.  Definitely bouncing off of someone - started the fun early.  Too bad you had to leave so soon!!  We could have had SO MUCH fun and gotten into SO MUCH trouble…  Parking lot conversations with special people are always awesome as well.  Glad that we connected on so many levels. I don’t know how it happened, but you are definitely my favorite member of the band.  And to think, it started with you making me feel like an asshole. 

Made a new friend - who would have thought I’d make a friend by making of point of arguing with him? Henry the hippie (not his real name of course), from Coventry, I still think in New England, it GENERALLY boils down to Sox vs Yankees.  So fun arguing with you last night, and I look forward to seeing you at the Tiger to resume our fight.

Rolled into the garage at 5AM and made the bad decision to take a 2 hour nap. Really should have stayed up… you would think by now, since it’s a proven fact that I can’t get home from CT before 3AM, that I would have learned that lesson.  But no. I am a hurtin’ pup.  A very hurtin’ pup.

See - slowly but surely removing the doom and gloom / pity party of the 18th a little bit more every year.  I can’t remember the last time I looked forward to my birthday this much.

Again, a huge thanks to Michele, Viz, Ben, Derek, Jonah, Aaron, Gian and Henry.  My birthday would not have been the same without you… and the day is just beginning!!!

Seven. teen. freaking. years.

mom :: may 3, 1946 - march 18, 1992

I’m going to go a little more raw here than usual.  It’s a special occasion… not a happy one, but a milestone nonetheless.  If you’re prone to crying, grab the kleenex. I’ll wait.

March 18th, 1992.  Seventeen years ago.

Two days before my 17th birthday, I came home from school to find my father crying at the kitchen table. With four little words, I suddenly learned my life would never be the same. Could never be the same. 

They held the wake on my birthday.  I did not go.

My mother and I had, at best, a complicated relationship.  That’s probably putting it too politely, but you guys don’t want the truth.  Trust me.

Seventeen years ago, I was two days shy of my 17th birthday.  Today, I am two days shy of my 34th.  I don’t need a calculator to tell me the significance of the timing. I’ve been dreading this birthday since 2001 - when my father passed away.  It’s a hell of a milestone to pass. There’s been a lot of life packed into the last seventeen years. 

A life where her only daughter, her only child, attended her alma mater and lived briefly in the same dorm, on the same floor, that she did.  A life that would have cast her as mother of the bride and the proud grandmother of two furbabies. A life where her sewing expertise would have come in handy several times.  A life where her fashion sense probably would have been very welcome. She wasn’t there for any of that.  She wasn’t even there to see me graduate from high school (and now college) with high honors, something that would have mattered to her, something she pushed me to attain.

She chose vodka over her only daughter.  Even when she was alive, she was dead to me. It’s terrible, I know.

You have no idea how badly I wish it had been different. 

I wish I knew the woman my father married.  The one he spent hours talking about during what would be our last day together.  I want to know that woman.  I will never be able to. My heart aches for the loss of this woman I never knew. It is that woman I mourn on the 18th of March… not the one I grew up with.

I try to not let it get to me.  Matter of fact, the last several birthdays have been fantastic.  I’ve been pushing hard for this one to be as well and I think I’m going to succeed. I had fun last week at the GTD Summit, which was an early birthday present to myself, and I’ll have fun in CT on Thursday and Saturday.  I’m expecting some awesome presents from people who have flat out told me they’re getting me something, despite my telling them that’s not necessary. The bar is set really high for this birthday, and so far, all signs point to the fact that it will be amazing.  (Well, it will be abso-fucking-lutely AWESOME if BU beats BC on Friday night, but that’s neither here nor there…)

At the end of the day, it all comes back to the fact that I’m here and she’s not… and that sucks.

 

I’ve been looking so long at these pictures of you, that I almost believe that they’re real. 
I’ve been living so long with my pictures of you, that I almost believe that the pictures are all I can feel.
- The Cure, “Pictures of You”

Hi, GTD’ers!

Starting to see hits coming from the Intercontinental.  w00t! My self-promotion cards must be working!

Like everyone else, I’m in my room processing all my notes from today’s breakout sessions… but thought I’d pop in real quick and say hey.

*waves*

Jason Lawrence, I’ll miss you!

jason lawrence :: agganis arena, boston, ma :: march 8, 2009

The hubby looked at this photo - among others from the same game - and told me I should get more serious about the photography.

I’m working on it.

Wednesday AM, I hop on a flight to San Francisco.  I will not be wearing flowers in my hair.

I’m a little bummed that I backed out of scheduling extra time in town to explore and take pictures, but let’s face it.  The things I’m most likely to take photos of now don’t stand still in the perfect light of a sunny afternoon.  No, the things I’m most likely to take photos of now are hockey players and, oh I don’t know, crazy UCMB alumni and that band that I hang around with.  Bad lighting, fast movement, ponies. That sort of thing. That’s what I get excited about now.  Taking pictures of the Golden Gate Bridge? YAWN.

I do plan on taking lots of pictures while I’m in San Fran… but not of the scenery. I’m going to get my geek on hardcore. I’m spending two days at the GTD Summit.  (Long time readers will remember my obsession with The David and Getting Things Done.) 

Yup.  Two days of networking with other GTD’ers.  Meeting Steve Leveen (from Levenger!  *squee*) and Guy Kawasaki and Meg Edwards and Eric Mack and all my new little Twitter pals. I’m hoping that there’s a sh’load of photos being taken of me & important people.  I’m hoping I give out a buttload of

business

self-promotion cards.  And most importantly, I’m hoping that I do crawl far enough out of my shell and do some serious networking.

When I get back, there’s so much more to look forward to:
Hockey East quarterfinals, Instrument, Instrument, Instrument, Instrument, Instrument, Vermont… And I’ve got a birthday and some Twilight making fun of to do crammed in there as well. w00t! I’ve got more of a life this March than I have in several years combined.

I think it’s a good thing I’ve got GTD in my life - it’s going to be hard to juggle all my fun stuff with all my not-so-much-fun stuff. 

Bring. It. On.