this is ridiculously amusing
I’ve been to London three times, walked up and down this bridge countless times, and never once noticed the shadow.
HOW THE FUCK DID I MISS A PENIS BRIDGE?!?!
Photo from here: 32 Pictures That Will Make Londoners Laugh Every Single Time
*sigh* all that work… headed to the frog pond
My first socks done toe-up and TAAT are headed to the frog pond. Somewhere, somehow, I screwed up pretty badly and there’s laddering up the borders of the pattern. It looks terrible on the needles and even worse on the foot. I’m not sure if it was because I did them two-at-a-tme, I counted completely wrong, or if I managed to drop a stitch on both socks in the exact same spot. All of which are, sadly, very likely to occur and may have even happened simultaneously. That’s how bad they are.
I don’t want to frog them, but as I looked at how fucked up they were, I realised that - more importantly - I hated knitting that fucking pattern. I mean, REALLY hated it.
I love the way Hermione’s Everyday Socks are knitting up, even though I’ve just started a pair in that pattern. (Socks for a friend, unfortunately.) I think it will look equally awesome in that red. And HES isn’t nearly as boring to work on.
It’s really weird how that happens - both are four row repeats, both are relatively simple combinations of knits and purls - but one is infinitely more fun to knit than the other.
I ended up buying a new Forester last Friday and broke it in by heading to Woodstock for Black Mountain Symphony’s record release party. 492 miles from the Subaru dealership, to Seabrook Town Hall, to my house, to Woodstock and back to my house - I’m already at 1,000 miles.
Have I mentioned I’ve only had the damn thing a week?
It was a hard decision and one I didn’t make lightly, despite how it may seem.
My dream car - my BMW - doesn’t come in a stick until you get to the 335, and I need an X-Drive (all wheel drive). When I found one, the sticker on it was $51K. FIFTY ONE THOUSAND. FOR A CAR. I still can’t get past the fact that my very first house was only $32K and I still can’t justify buying a car that costs more than a house. (Even though my current house has an insurance replacement value of $289K, I can’t use that for comparison. I just can’t.)
I know, I know… and I did know it was going to be ugly. I could go down to a 320 / 328, but I don’t want an automatic that thinks it’s a stick. I refuse to drive anything but a stick.
So… my car had had these ongoing issues with the fuel line. It kept throwing up “Check Engine” errors and the dealership was kind of playing hit or miss with the repairs. The first time, it was $500 for a new gas cap and some kind of fuel container thingy. This last time, it was $300 for a stupid gasket. (There were some tests, but seriously? $300 for what ended up being a $6 part.)
When I got it back, the car stunk like gas, but I was told that it was natural and the smell would go away. I didn’t have anything to worry about unless the check engine light came back on.
I don’t know about you, but worrying if my fuel line was going to go while I’m on the backwoods of MA / NY isn’t my idea of a good time. Worrying about whether or not the car would spontaneously combust wasn’t particularly enjoyable, either.
Maybe those are stupid concerns… but the car was paid off. If it hadn’t been, I’d probably still be scared shitless to drive it, but sucking it up until I could afford to pay it off.
I got a brand new 2015 Forester - approximately the same exact car (minus the horizontal roof rack thingies), with technology befitting a car seven model years newer - for the same exact payment as my old car.
I suppose I could have done a lot worse.
I have mixed feelings about it, which sounds completely weird, right? I love it - I really do - but it’s just that I didn’t want a damn car payment.
I have mixed feelings about Black Mountain Symphony’s new album. It sounds ‘flat’. I thought it was my speakers in the new car because I hadn’t tweaked them, but my iMac, iPhone, and Jamie’s car confirmed that it just sounds flat and shitty. Maybe it’s because I’ve heard the songs live a bazillion times and that energy didn’t carry over? I don’t know, but the first album sounded so crisp and clear that the mix on this album is really disappointing.
My other complaint with this album - and it’s definitely petty - is that I wasn’t listed on the liner notes, but someone’s dog was. We all joke that I’m the #1 fan, the miles I’ve put on my car, the amount of money I’ve put in tip jars, the fact that I’ve let them stay in my house (not once, but twice)... all of those are testaments to my dedication to them. I know they sincerely appreciate me. I’ve NEVER doubted that. Not for a second.
It would have been nice to get a public thank you… and there are quite a few others who are surprised that I was left off.
Especially in light of someone’s fucking DOG being thanked.
I’m not going to lie. It hurts.
I’ll get past it because it is so petty and minor in the grand scheme of things, but for now, I’m just going to let it bother me so I can get it out of my system.
I contacted another immigration law firm this morning. I laid out the reasons why I think I can claim citizenship and asked them simply if they thought I could and how much it would cost for that privilege.
I guess we’ll see…
sounds right to me
I had a blast at the Ukrainian Festival. Although I didn’t speak to anyone in anything other than English, by the end of the trip, I was confident enough in my accent to shout: “Героям слава!” every time someone said, “Слава Україні!” (Call: Glory to Ukraine! // Response: Glory to her heroes!) It’s kinda the Ukie equivalent of “USA! USA!”, if you need context.
The best vendor - and the only one I purchased anything from (!!!!) - was the Toronto Ukrainian Genealogical Group. They were so helpful when it came to giving me pointers on where to start looking for information on my grandparents. Granted, I know all I need to know to get their birth certificates and pursue Ukrainian citizenship, but now I’m curious about the rest of it. It doesn’t hurt, I guess, that I started to read Bloodlands: Europe Between Hitler and Stalin and realised that my grandparents’ families were saved because they lived on the Polish side of the border when the holodomor occurred. If they had lived in Soviet Ukraine, it might have been a different story. Then again, they got damn lucky they weren’t swept up in the insanity when Stalin decided he had to kill all the Poles…
It’s sobering to think of all the what-could-have-beens. It’s even more sobering to think that my grandparents lived through this part of history. (The key word there being LIVED.) That’s what got me curious about digging deeper and finding out more about my great grandparents in addition to anything more I can find about my grandparents.
I did learn something else. Something that I wasn’t expecting.
I’m not a Ukrainian (Roman) Catholic. I’m a Ukrainian (Greek) Catholic.
I always assumed that being a member of a Ukrainian Catholic church - and being sent to an American Catholic church for CCD - meant that I was a Roman Catholic. (At heart(?). I’m an agnostic in practice.) It turns out that the reason my American-flavoured religious education didn’t jive with the little bit of Ukrainian-flavoured religion I knew was because they weren’t the same thing. Fascinating.
Does it change the way I view organised religion? No. Does it make me want to go back to the church? No.
It’s just an interesting piece of trivia and something new to research.
So… I’ve managed to come back from Toronto with more questions than answers and yet another kick in the ass to work harder on my Ukrainian.
I was expecting one and not the other.
I’m not discouraged by either.
hey! look at that! contact cards!
I had to recreate them - after being printed! - because, of course, I don’t know how to spell in Ukrainian.
The revised version will be here too late for next weekend’s journey to Suzy-Q, but they will be ready for Toronto, and that’s really where I want to meet people.
If I can learn how to say “fuck me” in Ukrainian, my life would be complete…Of course, I can’t ask any of my new boyfriends to translate that for me because they’ll probably get the wrong idea. *grin*
I had my second tutoring session with my italki tutor. Right now, we’re just basically trying to figure out what I know and don’t know. For $6/hr, I’m not against starting from scratch. Beats $50/hr to struggle with EVERYTHING. I’m quite proud that we’ve already blown through her first two lessons because I know more than I thought I did. We’re not using video chat, either, which is making me feel more secure and less awkward. You wouldn’t think that would make such a difference, but it is - for me.
I’m also chatting with my Ukrainian boyfriends on italki. I’m not chatting as often as I should, but that’s because trying to bounce between spell-checking with google/bing translate and typing on a website in Ukrainian from my iPhone is a huge pain in my ass. It’s easier to do on a computer, but I’ve been spending more time off line after work. My laptop’s power cord has become a fire hazard and I hate being chained to the desktop. (Which I’m very glad I have, even though people think I’m weird to have both.) So, yeah, not really doing much of anything on a computer right now.
I cancelled my trip to New York tomorrow because I just wanted to stay home. I was SO excited to see Black Mountain Symphony play two shows back to back, but I’m just not interested in taking a road trip right now. I went to CT last weekend and I’m headed to Suzy-Q next weekend. Three days off of work, without the hubby, just seemed like the perfect excuse to eat crap and not get dressed in real clothes. I know. I’m a terrible friend, but, I’m doing what’s best for me. If I felt obligated to go, I wouldn’t have a good time.
I struggle to find new music because I don’t like listening to the radio, but I stumbled upon Ed Sheeran through Graham Norton’s show. It was a rough start for Ed and I - previewing all his albums on iTunes last week left me feeling kind of ‘eh’. I listened to them again this morning, and it’s taken all my self control not to buy EVERYTHING available. Who knows? It’s a nice break from the constant Ukrainian music.
The hubby and I have developed an unhealthy obsession with ‘Pitch Perfect’. It’s our go-to film when we can’t decide what we want to watch. It’s so bad, we can practically quote the whole thing. I’m actually watching it right now (3rd time this week) while I prepare to do my Ukrainian homework.
Speaking of, I should probably stop stalling and get to that Ukrainian homework…
suzy-q ukie fest, 2009
Alternatively, I could’ve titled this “How I’ve learned to embrace alcoholism”
I don’t think it’s a secret that I love music, so one of the ways I’ve been learning Ukie is by listening to Ukrainian music (ska/punk/rock). Listening / learning goes a little like this:
First listen: OH! I REALLY LIKE THIS BEAT!
Second listen: Wait. I think I understand that… something, something, something LOVE! Something about reading. Birds?
And so on and so forth until I feel confident in matching the sounds and can sing along.
The newest band I’ve been listening to, TIK, is one of the headliners at the Toronto Ukrainian Festival. (Which I will be attending and hopefully conversing mostly in Ukrainian. It’s good to have goals.)
Anyhoo, my first listen to “АЛКО голізм” went something like this:
OH. FUCK. Are they saying what I think they’re saying?
My second listen went like this:
OH. FUCKING. FUCK. That’s fucking catchy as fuck. Fuck.
My third listen went something like this:
Drink. Water. Alcohol. Where. Here. People. Alcoholism. Hand. Drink! Drink! Drink! Drink! Drink! There is not. Alcoholic. Vodka and beer. Drink. Yes (so?). You cannot. I want to live. You need to drink. Alcoholism. Hand. Drink! Drink! Drink! Drink! Drink! I do not know who is and I do not know who. No drink. Morning. Day. Soviets. Communism. Alcoholism.
OH. FUCKING. FUCK. *dies*
So. Yeah. Not only do I know more than I thought I did, but… I’ve become the walking definition of irony.
The girl whose parents both died from complications due to alcoholism’s favourite song is about drinking. With a chorus that’s basically Drink! Drink! Drink! Drink! Drink!
Seeing how my translation is rudimentary at best, I think I got the wrong idea. The band’s name is an abbreviation of the Ukrainian phrase “Тверезість і культура” which means “Sobriety and Culture”, and Google (and Bing) translate also make me think my original thoughts are wrong.
Either way, give it a listen. Let me know what you think.