Скільки не стріляй в наш край
Скільки не пали поля
Житиме вічно наша ненька
Вродить ще не раз земля
Скільки не стріляй в наш край
Скільки не пали поля
Житиме вічно наша ненька
Вродить ще не раз земля
Наша Батьківщина б’ється гордо
Ми не в пах, а в морду
Наша Батьківщина за свободу
Перегризе горло
Наша Батьківщина тільки наша
Не віддам нізащо
Наша Батьківщина б’ється завше
Збережи її, Отче Наший
Ненька наша рідна, ти потерпи ше чу-чуть
Наші Січові стрільці добре ворога січуть
Око за око наші хлопці точно пики натовчуть
Збройні сили України не дадуть задуть свічу
Скільки не стріляй в наш край
Скільки не пали поля
Житиме вічно наша ненька
Вродить ще не раз земля
Скільки не стріляй в наш край
Скільки не пали поля
Житиме вічно наша ненька
Вродить ще не раз земля
Кулі дебіли полетіли, бо не мали права вони на слова
Воля - це дівчина, шо любить дім, тільки руским би не дала
Кулі дебіли полетіли, бо не мали права вони на слова
Воля - це дівчина, шо любить дім, тільки руским би не дала
Звідти, де волі люд не мали, звідти ті тихі голоси
А звідки чорнила виливали, явно, що там не чистота
Скільки вже наша пережила ненька, така ще молода
Жовте осіннє плаття зняла, а камуфляжне - ти вбрала
А на дев’ятий поверх упало не сонце
Дивлюся на двір через нове віконце
Ангел тут живе мій лише охоронцем, бо
На дев’ятий поверх упало не сонце
Скільки не стріляй в наш край
Скільки не пали поля
Житиме вічно наша ненька
Вродить ще не раз земля
Скільки не стріляй в наш край
Скільки не пали поля
Житиме вічно наша ненька
Вродить ще не раз земля
Око за око, зуб за зуб
Загризуть тут за тризуб
Око за око, зуб за зуб
Наші тихо підповзуть
No matter how much you shoot at our land
How many fields did not fall
Our grandmother will live forever
The earth will give birth more than once
No matter how much you shoot at our land
How many fields did not fall
Our grandmother will live forever
The earth will give birth more than once
Our Motherland fights proudly
We are not in the groin, but in the face
Our Motherland is for freedom
He will bite his throat
Our Motherland is only ours
I won’t give it away for anything
Our Motherland is always fighting
Save her, Our Father
Our dear Nenka, you will suffer a lot
Our Sich snipers cut the enemy well
An eye for an eye, our guys will definitely crush spades
The Armed Forces of Ukraine will not let the candle blow out
No matter how much you shoot at our land
How many fields did not fall
Our grandmother will live forever
The earth will give birth more than once
No matter how much you shoot at our land
How many fields did not fall
Our grandmother will live forever
The earth will give birth more than once
Bullets of morons flew because they had no right to speak
Volya is a girl who loves home, but she wouldn’t give it to Russians
Bullets of morons flew because they had no right to speak
Volya is a girl who loves home, but she wouldn’t give it to Russians
From there, where people had no free will, those quiet voices came from there
And from where the ink was poured, it is clear that there is no cleanliness there
How much our little girl has experienced, she is still young
You took off the yellow autumn dress, and you put on the camouflage one
And it was not the sun that fell on the ninth floor
I look at the yard through a new window
The angel lives here only as my guard, because
The sun did not fall on the ninth floor
No matter how much you shoot at our land
How many fields did not fall
Our grandmother will live forever
The earth will give birth more than once
No matter how much you shoot at our land
How many fields did not fall
Our grandmother will live forever
The earth will give birth more than once
An eye for an eye, a tooth for a tooth
They will bite the trident here
An eye for an eye, a tooth for a tooth
Ours will quietly creep up
just like the real citgo sign, it only works about 85% of the time
Favorite American Artist: Matt Nathanson
Concert: 10 February 2023, Fort Lauderdale
Ticket Acquired: ✅
Favourite Ukrainian Band: Океан Ельзи
Concert: 27 April 2023, Miami
Ticket Acquired: ✅
Second Favourite Ukrainian Band: Антитіла
Concert: 18 October 2023, Miami
Ticket Acquired: ✅
Third Favourite Ukrainian Band: Бумбокс
Concert: 8 March 2023, Miami
Ticket Acquired: ✅
New Love: KALUSH
Concert: 10 March 2023, Orlando
Ticket Acquired: ✅
If you’ve been around me for any length of time, you know how much live music means to me. I mean, fuck, I used to drive to Upstate NY as much as I could to see Black Mountain Symphony. There were countless trips to Connecticut for Instrument and All Crazy shows. That doesn’t even begin to scratch the surface of what I jokingly called “Scott-the-Roadie: Live at UConn” - all the BiG MiSTAKE, Frogboy, and Spring Heeled Jack shows I used to attend with him. Then, there were the nights at The Sting, and the nights at Toad’s Place. A random concert in Maryland. The day I went to a gathering at Bird’s that turned into an impromptu concert only to leave and catch BMS in Providence. (That, my friends, was probably one of my more ridiculous weekends: I drove through four New England states in less than 24 hours.)
Thinking about it, I’ve probably spent more of my life at live shows than I have engaging in any of my other hobbies in my life to date.
Of course, I don’t have the luxury of getting in the car and driving to NY anymore. It breaks my heart to think of the ridiculous logistics nightmare leaving Florida has become. There’s a plane ticket, and a hotel, and a rental car… I hate shit like that. I just want to get in the car and go. The drive itself is as therapeutic as the live show. All planes, hotels, and rental cars do is stress me the fuck out.
There is one unexpected perk of being exiled to Florida - the massive Ukrainian community in Miami.
I haven’t been kidding when I’ve babbled on about how thrilled I am about the opportunity to see ALL of my favourite Ukrainian bands.
Granted, I hate the reason why they’re all on tour, but… at the same time…
I GET TO SEE ALL FOUR OF MY FAVOURITE UKRAINIAN BANDS THIS YEAR!!!!
- - - - - - - - - -
I went on a deep dive in YouTubeLand to find live video of KALUSH and… expectations matched reality.
Seriously.
This video confirmed that I’ve been to too many shows.
When you can perfectly imagine a show just by listening to the recorded versions of songs, you know that shit needs to be a resume-level skill.
I’m always that person who takes charge of a group project when people are slacking… this time, I bulldozed a Captain.
In my defence, not a single person on the team was offering anything up, and I have charities that mean a shit-ton to me.
FRC is attempting a new format for racery - teams of five people randomly chosen, a fundraising component, and all the shenanigans we’ve grown to love.
I’m really looking forward to this one. The last few just haven’t been fun because people talk offline and make teams full of super cappers. They take off and are impossible to catch… but, with random people creating teams? We might actually have a chance to have fun this go ‘round.
So any way - I wanted to choose Cobblestone for our charity, but that didn’t work out. (Cobblestone hooked us up with with our trip to Lviv, sent us the most amazing tour guide ever, and now are helping support his family through donations. I donate as much as I can, when I can.) Unfortunately, Cobblestone isn’t a registered charity in Canada yet.
I asked if we could fundraise for Razom for Ukraine. This is a better known charity and absolutely massive. I’d rather donate to them, if I can’t directly donate to Ukrainians hurt by the lack of tourism.
Razom is the transliterated version of разом - the Ukrainian word for together. (It’s pronounced “rah-zom”)
The team ran with the word, brainstormed different ways to use razom in the team name, and we settled on razoomies, because, well, we’ll zoom.
Razombies was also thrown out there. I loved that one, too.
Our team colours were also chosen for us. The Ukrainian flag serving as inspiration.
I know it’s trendy right now to care about Ukraine, but - of course - this means so much to me, personally.
I’ve been crying on and off, I’ve been so touched by the interest.
I have bunch of hashtags chosen for the race itself and I’m so excited to use them.
If we’re friends on Facebook, you’re about to get sick of the relentless posts sending you to the racery fundraising link. And I’d apologise, but sorry, not sorry.
And I devoured that fucker in between bouts of swearing at iTunes / Apple Music / whatever the fuck Apple is calling it now. DEVOURED.
YES. IT IS SO GOOD IT DESERVES SOME SERIOUS ALL CAPS LOVING. AND THE REALLY GOOD LUBE.
There is something amazing about her writing, and whether it’s Steter / Stetopher / original characters, she always delivers. I think the majority of my AO3 Teen Wolf bookmarks are her stories.
I don’t remember how I found out about it, but now I see that she’s co-written an entire series of LGBTQIA+ stories with Discontented Winter. (And - rabbit hole alert! - this just made my entire fucking, um, 15 minutes.)
I’m going to need to get a tumblr account again just to follow those two.
Just like I had to get a new twitter account for the balloon ladies tracker.
Every time I think it’s OK to get rid of an orphaned account, AS SOON AS I HIT “DELETE MY ACCOUNT”, shit happens.
- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -
An entire lifetime ago, when I bought the new MBP, I decided to shelve the old iMac. I didn’t need two computers on my desk; not when one of them basically served as a jukebox.
I took my little LaCie drive that had my iTunes library on it, (bought a FUCKING ADAPTER. For fuck’s sake, Apple. STOP IT.), and fired up the Music app.
Holy Jesus motherfucking crispy Christ on a fucking bike.
I had multiple versions of songs. And I don’t mean twelve different versions of R.E.M.‘s “It’s the End of the World…” - I have twelve of those because it’s on Best Ofs, bootlegs, and studio albums.
I mean I have six different “Spin, Spin, Sugar” files in my hard drive, each one sitting happily as a line in the iTunes song listing.
Apparently, the app made a habit of creating a music folder when 1) it downloaded a song and 2) every time it decided / forced me to “organize” my library.
So, I had music folders in music folders in music folders in music folders in.. you get the gist, yes?
And every single one of those folders held MY ENTIRE MUSIC LIBRARY.
I filled up a massive external hard drive with music because Apple decided to duplicate my music folder every fucking time it felt like it.
I’ve been cleaning it up in bits and pieces because when you have a dozen files named “01_Intro” you have to be VERY FUCKING CAREFUL. (Why do bootleggers all name their files like this?!?! I mean, I love the consistency, but I can’t tell if that intro is from Boston ‘95 or Boston ‘03. Just sayin’...)
I’m also overwriting the metadata on the music files - I HATE transliterated Ukrainian, so I’m putting everything into Cyrillic. Now, everything shows up in iTunes the way God intended it to. (But seriously, fuck record labels who use transliterated Ukrainian on albums.)
I’ve been buying new music on the phone and then downloading it to the computer. THEN, I have to go into the new, clean, pretty, hard drive, REMOVE THE MUSIC FOLDER, and put the songs where they actually fucking belong.
It doesn’t seem to like the fact that my music folder is “LaCie/iTunes/Music” - I’m pretty sure that’s what’s confusing things… but when I have the location as “LaCie/iTunes” Apple rejects the location and claims it can’t find my iTunes library.
I have some random files still to find and I am missing entire R.E.M. bootlegs, so that’s going to be a search. I also need to pull the playlists off the iMac at some point.
But, I’m considering the task done.
I can listen to music when I’m sitting at the computer again.
I’ll take that as a win.
- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -
In other news, I only finished the 5K and the 10K this year. Dopey attempt #2 shat the bed.
(The husband was there to watch the epic fail, but that’s a story for another time… it only took a $50 gift card to Pure Hockey (which I bought before he became an unsupportive ass thankyouverymuch) for him to understand what it means to support someone. grrrrrrrrrrrrr)
I know there’s a lot of factors at play and the asthma seems to be the biggest issue. I was struggling to breathe after pushing myself for 9 miles and a medic practically forced me off the course.
I hated the pulmonologist I saw, so I have to find another one.
I’m also trying to figure out what I do about running… I had a goal to move every day, even if it’s just a mile on the treadmill in my jammies.
And I promptly threw that plan out the window and have been sat here, licking my wounds, and refusing to even think about the treadmill.
2023 and I are not getting off to the best start.
- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -
Oh wait.
I lied.
I’m a lying liar who lies because…
I HAVE HIT A MUSICAL TRIFECTA.
I’m seeing Matt Nathanson (Mike Nickerson? Matt Petty? Whatever the fuck his name is.) in February. Dropped a shit ton on the pre-show hang, too. Love those extra moments with him. Even if I can’t remember his name.
I’m seeing БУМБОКС(!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!) in March. They’re finally coming overseas. I mean, I forgive them for cancelling on last March’s show, and I hate that this a fundraising / awareness raising tour, but they’re FINALLY coming.
And and and and and and and and and and and and…
MOTHERFUCKING ОКЕАН ЕЛЬЗИ IS COMING TO MIAMI IN APRIL.
Bonus: Антитіла is coming overseas in the fall. No idea where or when, but I’m there. Even if I have to get on a plane.
Still pissed I missed KALUSH because of Wine and Dine, but…
Бумбокс, Океан Ельзи, and Антитіла are the Ukrainian OG Three and I get to see ALL THREE OF THEM THIS YEAR.
I don’t think I’ve ever been more satisfied, music wise.
(Also, I think it’s time to be frightened by the amount of time I spend on the internet. I wanted to find out what “a trifecta but four” was and, wow, that was the first autofill suggestion google came up with. I don’t know if I should hang my head in shame over that or laugh hysterically.)
(Spoiler: I laughed hysterically. And fell off the damn chair.)
To be honest, I had forgotten about it and scheduled a dog grooming appointment in that time slot instead.
For what it’s worth, I was completely overwhelmed at the amount of information there was. It just seemed like too much work for a one-off. Yeah. Despite having a bunch of pocket friends who play, I’m just not interested.
- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -
I thought I’d end this with my most favourite songs from the four bands I’m seeing this year, but some of them have already been posted. And besides, how do I pick my favourite????
I’m just going randomize that shit and give you whatever the magic wheel spits out. (Just like a Mike Nickerson show!)
We’ll start with The Infamous Wheel just so you get the joke. (Bonus! We were at this show.)
When the sun is getting lower // and your wildest days are done // and they ask you ‘bout a photograph // from back when you were young // well, baby, you don’t have to tell ‘em // what we did when we were us // but when I think about it // I hope you blush, just a little bit…
Скажi менi, чому не можу // Забути те, чого нема.
Tell me why I cannot // forget what I do not have.
Хворі ми хворобою однією // На щастя ще не вигадали від неї панацею // На голову мов злива впала ця вразлива манія // Діагноз – меломанія, в нас з вами – меломанія
We are sick with the same disease. // Fortunately no panacea for it hasn’t been discovered yet. // This vulnerable mania has fallen on my head like a rainfall. // The diagnosis is melomania. We all have melomania.
[Melomania: A singular passion for music, that is beyond all reason. An abnormal love of music. A hobby or even an excessive fanaticism for music.]
Люби вільно, цілуй поволі. // Прощай швидко, або ніколи. // Часу мало, маєш дійти. // Хочеш правди? Мусиш знайти. // Люди далi прокидаються. // Люди далi не ховаються. // Нова глибина напроти нас. // Отакий цiкавий час.
Love freely but kiss slowly. // Forgive faster or never know it. // There’s a few time for you to come // You need the truth so find it now. // People keeping waking up. // People no more hiding now. // There’s new deepness here ahead. // Interesting the time we have…
I’m sure johnlock exists because Conan Doyle used ejaculate so much…
I haven’t run or walked since my disastrous finish at the Turkey Trot.
I deferred my entry for a 5K / Half Marathon combo this weekend.
I have the Dopey Challenge in less than a month and I haven’t successfully finished a half marathon since last January.
You can’t fake a marathon, so as long as I get a little further than when I was swept last year, I’ll be happy.
I keep thinking about why I chose to start running.
Why I chose to do Dopey two years in a row, knowing that I wasn’t going to train for it properly.
I don’t know if this is depression or weight gain or… something I can’t put my finger on.
I’m still shocked that I put in all that work with a running coach and didn’t even plateau.
No. I couldn’t do something that actually makes sense.
Instead, I went on a downward spiral so brutal I’m still trying to figure out what went wrong.
And I really doubt it’s a simple as exercise induced asthma, although that’s a great excuse.
- - - - - - - - - -
In other news, last Sunday, I had my first nosebleed. (Seriously. Never had one before.)
Monday, I had my second and third.
Tuesday, I had my fourth, my fifth, and my sixth.
Wednesday, I went to Urgent Care looking for a quick fix or a reason. Had my seventh.
Thursday, saw an ENT who found the equivalent of a pimple in my nose and zapped it. Was told more nosebleeds were part of the healing process. (What the actual FUCK?!?!?!?!?!?!)
Friday, had my eighth right as a zoom meeting started. Ninth was so bad I freaked out. Tenth was annoying.
I haven’t had a nosebleed since Friday night, but I’m terrified of it starting again.
That’s part of why I deferred my race entry. I didn’t want to be on a course somewhere, not near a med tent, if it started again. It wasn’t like I could carry a box of Kleenex and a garbage can with me.
- - - - - - - - - -
I’m getting a very generous raise effective January first, and a nice Christmas bonus.
Except, since my longevity at jobs is so bad (can I call it shortgevity?), that the owner said it was a bribe to make me stay.
I wanted to tell him that hurt and that he could keep his money…
It’s not like I take jobs planning to leave in a year or two.
Seriously. Why the fuck would I do this myself?
More importantly, with the exception of Global Spectrum, who actually plans on leaving a place every few years? (At Global, it was the norm to look for better positions, at better arenas. Every week, they sent out an internal job posting email, and by the end of the 30 day posting period, most of those jobs were gone. I love the hire from within culture as long as it’s followed through.)
I really like it at most of the jobs I take, but I always end up leaving when something triggers the bipolar, or the politics in the office become unbearable.
For example: I kind of liked my job at an airport, but the owner was spending so much and the books were so bad, that payroll was withheld twice. I can’t work and not get paid.
For example: I liked the health care company I worked at, but there were two bullies who made everyone miserable. I was given a promotion, but no raise, with the entire job description being to keep those two in line. In the end, I guess the joke’s on them. I had been working with the Controller on a super secret project to prepare the financials needed to sell the company. The company was sold and everyone lost their jobs. I would have been one of them if I hadn’t left before that.
For example: I liked the HVAC company I worked for, but I hated the Assistant Controller. She was on a mission to get the CFO fired so she could take his job. When he retired, we were supposed to be co-Controllers, but she started doing some shady shit with the financials to get him out the door. I left for Florida, and she got fired by the Board because they didn’t like her. I still can’t help but wonder if she would have taken me down with her. My gut says yes.
For example: I LOVED my job with the Cats… but that was the third time I had stayed until I couldn’t fight the bipolar any more. We all know how that ended. It was the first time I’d ever been fired for losing control of it. Because I refused to let myself quit. That only confirmed that my pattern was correct… so I stuck to it.
All in all, it makes me wonder if I should give up. We can’t really afford the loss of my salary if I were to go on Disability, and I need to work or I’ll go crazy. (Which is awesome considering it is holding a job that creates issues.)
But.
I guess it’s nice to have that option in my back pocket… even if it’s going to be a battle to qualify.
- - - - - - - - - -
And finally, I’ve given up on my Ukrainian lessons for a bit.
I only want to learn from native speakers. From Ukraine.
Of course, Ukraine is still having problems with their electrical grid and rolling blackouts are a thing. I’ve had two classes that needed to be rescheduled because of Putin.
But I know my teacher needs the money more than I do, so I’ve been doing the best I can to work with it.
But for as frustrating as it is for me, I can only imagine what it’s like for her.
The strain of living there is obvious in the lines of her face, the forced way she says ‘good’ when I ask her how she is doing.
Related: I’ve been watching Sims YouTubers who narrate in Ukrainian, and that’s been helping my listening comprehension quite a bit.
So. On that happy note, I’m going to end it right here. Have the best rest of your day and I’ll see you all tomorrow.
