Do you have a boyfriend? Which is fine, by the way.

June 28, 2013 :: 9:11 AM

truer words were never spoken

There are 3 major components to human sexuality: biological sex, sexual orientation, and gender identity.

Each of these 3 components offer multiple variables and the variables with which you present comprise your sexuality.

Asserting that any one set of these variables is any better than another is ludicrous.

LOVE WHO YOU WANT. IT’S ALL FINE

(Still celebrating the fact that DOMA and Prop 8 are dead.)

——

I have a phone screen today with a company based over an hour away from here.  They have clients that hire them for accounting duties and then they assign clients to their accounting staff… I’d be part of that staff and after some training at HQ, I’d be able to work from home.The pay’s not the greatest, but I think I can offset that by not having to commute.

Can I work from home? That’s the magic question, isn’t it?

I’m terribly lonely right now, but I’m also sitting on the couch, doing absolutely nothing after I do my few hours of job searching. Part of that is because I know I’m no fun right now (wicked, wicked, wicked, deep dark depression) and part of that is all the people that I’d hang out with don’t live around me. If I wasn’t depressed, I’d probably be doing some projects around the house. But I can barely get out of bed to get Guinness to day care… and the only reason he’s even going is because we prepaid in January for the year.

If I were working, I’d have contact with people. I’d have a reason to get out of bed. I know I have the discipline to work from home…

Let’s hope the screen goes better than that assessment earlier this week, because that completely set my mental state back quite a few notches.

——

Playing in John Finnemore’s sandbox and writing this Cabin Pressure fan fic is KILLING me.

The series is set in real time, so Series 1 took place in 2008 and it goes all the way through Series 4 which takes place in 2013. (The only oddity is that Arthur stated to be 29 in the first three series… Considering that Finnemore plays Arthur, you think he’d catch that. *sigh* At least that doesn’t screw up anything because I couldn’t remember how old Arthur was in Series 4 so I said he was in his early thirties.)

I have this great story, but the timeline fell to shit when I realized that possibly the most important part of my story takes place in 2013. Everything kind of hangs on the events of “Yverdon-les-Bains”, which is the last episode in Series 4. The other important parts I’ve squeezed in between series… Part 1 of the trilogy takes place in October 2009, Part 2 in 2011 (which - the way I wrote it - included the resolution of Y-L-B’s cliffhanger), Part 3 was scheduled to fit around Christmas 2012, and Part 4 was pushed out to 2014 to make something important make sense in the canon timeline.

Everything in the first three parts references Y-L-B and I knew the reference didn’t really belong in Part 1, but I had to write the next parts to see where it would fit better. EVERYTHING in the second part happens because of Y-L-B,  but since the second part kind of needs to happen before 2013, I’m totally screwed.

The only good thing is that Part 1 is Martin’s story, which while dependent on Douglas’ divorce in 2009, doesn’t need Y-L-B in it. The only problem is that I like having Part 2 in Paris, and Paris was aired in 2011… I think I may have to find a new city for that piece of the story to take place in. Fuck, fuck, fuck, fuckity, fuck, fuck, fuck…

Being unemployed right now is not good, but at least I have this to distract me and keep me busy. VERY busy.


For every happy, there is a sad.

June 26, 2013 :: 12:18 PM

image

every day should have a little tennant on barrowman action

BUH-FUCKING-BYE
“In recent years, California‚Äôs Proposition 8 and the discriminatory Defense of Marriage Act became symbols of anti-LGBT discrimination around the country and around the world. Today, both crumbled. In a watershed moment in the fight for equality, the United States Supreme Court today ruled to return marriage equality to California and to strike down DOMA.”

That makes me cry tears of joy… you have no idea how bad I’m bawling right now.

——

Of course, for every happy, there is a sad.

Like the interview I blew today.

This company makes you do an online assessment thing before they even consider you for an interview. You do it at home, comfortable, relaxed… and it’s easy. Relatively.

I’m not quite sure why it’s important to know which triangle comes next in a series, or what the counterpart of “bread is to food” is, but they stake their whole recruiting process on this test.

After you pass it once, you have to pass it AGAIN on site, before you get brought in for the actual in-person interview.

There is a big sign that basically prepares you to fail: You won’t finish this in the time required. Your score must be around the same as the at-home assessment or you can go straight home when you’re done. (Paraphrased, but it’ll do.)

I don’t do well at timed exams. I definitely don’t do well when I’m being set up to not do well. (Apparently, they have a very low pass rate.)

My on-site results were so vastly different from my at home results, they couldn’t be sure the same person took the two exams. 

So I got walked out before I could even talk to anyone and prove that I’m more than competent for this position.

There aren’t enough words in ANY language to describe how bad I feel…


Dear Yahoo!, welcome to tumblr

May 21, 2013 :: 11:19 AM

image

i’d be worried if they chose wincest

It’s been said that the SuperWhoLock fandom is the largest fandom on tumblr. I don’t know if that’s true, but it’s awesome that the SPN fandom decided to welcome Yahoo! in a fashion that truly reflects who we are.

——

The other day, I mentioned companies giving email interviews instead of reaching out to do a phone screen… well, one of those actually worked in my favor and I have a phone screen with them tonight. I’m assuming this is interview two out of dog knows how many.

The weirdest thing about this is that this is a type of company I never thought I’d be interested in working for in a million years. It’s a political group that aligns themselves with the majority of things I support: LGBT equality, Planned Parenthood, the ACLU. (Yes, my inner liberal is showing.) But I’ve never been a political person. I wait until the night before election day to finally make my choice as to who to vote for, even if I already have an idea. I figure by that point, the candidates have already said everything they’re going to say. As long as we agree on my four main issues, I’ll vote for that candidate. What scares me about that is that one day, I may have to vote Republican. Of course, I highly doubt that will ever happen, but you never know.

I’m the worst person to talk politics with. I get emotional. I don’t make sense. If we disagree, I’m likely to hate your guts (temporarily) and hold a grudge (not so temporary).

Yeah.

But…it’s in Boston, they haven’t balked at my salary requirements, and I’m actually pretty excited to have the opportunity to work for a company like that.

In my favor: the fact that I worked for an environmentally friendly heating oil company. (No, you read that right. We blended waste vegetable oil into our #2 oil. Lowers the carbon footprint and reduces the dependency on foreign petroleum sources.) Of course, I didn’t take that job because I believed in what the company did, but as time went on and I got more educated, I grew proud of our product. It makes me look all environmentally friendly, even though that’s not one of my pet causes.

(HOLY CRAP! THERE’S A CHARACTER NAMED “AMY POND” IN THIS EPISODE OF SUPERNATURAL! When fandoms collide…)

Also in my favor: I also have a degree in marketing and experience in market research and advertising. Political group - they work on campaigns, so they may need new ways to get their message out.

Despite the ridiculous amounts of resumes I’m sending out, there are some positions I would kill for. THOSE are the ones I’m spending hours on - rearranging my resume to highlight what they’re looking for in the first few bullet points, and writing cover letters that dig into the job description and give details on what I did.  The others get a half-assed cover letter and a resume.

They hit three out of the four: equality, civil rights, reproductive rights. If I could work for a company that pushes for those causes…

Well, let’s put it this way…

It ain’t Sig Sauer.


CUMBERTREK!!!!!!!! (and the job search)

May 18, 2013 :: 5:18 PM

two of my favorite things: animaniacs and sherlock

Still not a huge fan of Star Trek, but damn that was an enjoyable couple of hours.

Seriously, anything with Quinto? Simon Pegg? My new crush Chris Pine? AND the Cumbercutie?

I may or may not have broken two of J’s fingers when I first heard that voice. If I hadn’t, I definitely did towards the end. Evil Cumberbatch is HOT. HOT. HOT. HOT. HOT.

——

I also may or may not have made J listen to “Cabin Pressure” for the whole whopping twenty minutes we were in the car. He may or may not have laughed. Actually, he lost it when I played him the opening of the Christmas episode.

Which I will now share with you since I’m in such a damn good mood:

 

——

Why am I in such a good mood you ask?

I just got an email from one of the companies I applied to on Friday. It took me forever to change my resume around, write the cover letter and research the company. FOREVER. But obviously, it paid off. It seems like it would be a good job… at the minimum my whacked out liberal ideals would be appreciated for a change. Plus, they might be able to use my marketing background as well.

The thing that bothers me - and this is minor, even though it’s not going to sound like it - is that this is the second company I’ve applied to that has sent me an interview type email. Thanks for applying. Hey! While we have your attention, here’s twenty questions we’d like you to answer. It’s ridiculous. On top of the time it takes me to actually prepare my application, now I have to go back and spend hours answering questions via email. It’s not like you can just fire off an email in response - these are GOOD interview questions and it’s hard to answer them in the right tone over email. How do you not sound desperate when you tell them your salary range is negotiable, but you’re looking to make $X? At least in person, you can gauge the reaction…

And when did it become OK to make THAT one of the screening questions?

If I ask it in the first interview, I’m rude. Unprofessional. So I have to go through the whole process blind - getting my hopes built up until I find that I can’t afford to take the position - but it’s OK to be written off in the first interview question?

*sigh*

——

Maybe I should dump my drug dealer and go back to having my brain shrunk. I might be able to qualify for SSDI, and THAT would actually pay me better than unemployment (which, of course, I may not even be eligible for).

I hate this.

I hate feeling powerless.

I hate feeling like a drain on J.

I hate feeling bad that I just spent $18 to drool over a guy in a theatre when I can watch all the stuff saved on the TiVo or the Sherlock DVDs again and again for free.

I just want a real job interview. In person. Where I may actually have a fighting chance

*double sigh*

——

Here’s a Sherlock/Cabin Pressure mashup to make me giggle…

 


I legit love this fandom

May 03, 2013 :: 11:16 AM

image

oh my dog… best use of that line ever

I can’t believe I’m saying this, but Moffat wrote that episode. I almost love him for that.

*shakes fist*

I just watched “The Good Night” because it has Martin in it. The man has the most expressive face I’ve ever seen… and I will never understand his love of cable knit jumpers. I was only half paying attention to the movie because I was on the phone with my pimp, Jim. (Dog, I have pimps and drug dealers in my life. I really should start calling people what they are, shouldn’t I? But calling people recruiters and psychiatric nurse practitioners who specialize in psych meds is SO boring.)

Where was I?

Oh, right. Jumpers. As far as I can tell, he wears two. Exactly the same, except one is a sage green and the other is oatmeal.

A fucking OATMEAL jumper. I’d bet it’s the same exact one he wears in Sherlock.

The man is insane.

——

This wasn’t meant to be a post about Martin Freeman. Or Benedict Cumberbatch’s cheekbones… even though I could go on about those FOREVER. And that voice… pure sex. Fringy-Sideburny-Gingerbatch is definitely hot. GAH. I need to stop before I start a Sherlock marathon and completely lose my mind.

(I’m finally watching “Tinker Tailor Soldier Spy” and OMG he is amazing. I’m freaking out over here. Totally disgusting fangirling.)

——

So, let’s get to the point, shall we?

I’ve found two international companies worth working for and one with the potential to go global. One of them I actually have a connection at - but I’m probably really not qualified for it. I can’t see that person going out on a limb for me. Plus, it’s in Amsterdam. I don’t have a problem with Amsterdam - besides the fact that I keep spelling it wrong - but why would a company take a risk on moving someone who is definitely not qualified overseas?

I’m a little amazed that I don’t really care that I’m unemployed right now. Such a weird change from the last time… but after everything they had put me through, it was heart breaking to be let go so coldly. Other than the recruiter, I haven’t done much in the way of looking. I decided to take these last two days off. It’s my mother’s birthday today, dad’s anniversary was Monday, and we went through so much shit with Guinness over the weekend that I just needed a break from the drama. 

I’m still not experienced enough for some of the accounting jobs I want and that is upsetting, but I don’t know what to do. It’s not like I can magically learn about STAT or IFRS, or ERP systems, or Great Plains, or even earn a MBA or CPA overnight…

I’m second guessing myself about not applying for the job at Sig. It’s everything I want in a job and absolutely NOTHING I want in a company. (I mean, come on. Even at my most manic, reckless, stupid moments, I can NOT forget about this. Or my experience.)

I wish I could separate the two. You have no idea how badly I want to be able to separate the two. 

Fucking morals…

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