music is life

SMERFs and Leslie’s Poo

August 09, 2013 :: 9:26 PM

poster designers are assholes

Now that I’ve gotten over the panic of finding a new job, and actually BEING at the new job, life is pretty damn good.

Here’s some quick snippets of life at the hotel / motel / Holiday Inn…

My official title is Assistant Corporate Controller, but when I write it down, I almost always write it as “Ass Controller.” I don’t know why I insist on forgetting that damn T every time, but I do.

One of our vendors, Leslie’s Poolmart, is in our software as Leslie’s Poo.

We had a reservation for a group listed as “New Englind Executive Ass”. I have no idea what they do, but I fucking LOVE the name. (Let’s just ignore the fact that the brain trust who booked the group in the system can’t spell New England.)

(Yeah… I’m 12 years old and laughing at ass and poop jokes.)

It is expensive to replace elevators. I mean, I know they’re not cheap - this is actually the second company I’ve worked for that’s installed new elevators - but it’s shocking when you have to write a check for six figures, which is only 40% of the total cost.

It’s also crazy expensive to be a franchisee of a brand name chain. The amount they charge us for the use of their name, among other brand specific things, is ridiculous.

SMERFs are a real thing! It’d be cooler if they were little blue creatures who live in mushrooms, but SMERFs are SMERFs.

I’m learning all kinds of exciting new things. The hospitality industry is like a gazillion different types of fascinating. So much goes into running a hotel that it’s insane… besides the meth lab in our HQ, I’ve heard stories of thieving housekeepers, domestic disturbances, trashed hotel rooms, shady front desk staff. Not necessarily at any of our hotels, but we did have a trashed room during my first or second week. That was pretty cool. OH! And the room next to ours? A car drove into it. Right through the fucking wall. (Long before I started, but that had to have been interesting.)

So yeah… now that life is calm, the bipolar is hibernating, and I’m generally feeling pretty damn chipper… I’m happy there and I can see myself there for a long time.

It took long enough.

It didn’t hurt that I got to see Black Mountain Symphony on Saturday, in Weedstock either. That was huge in putting my world right, as it always is.

Oh - let’s discuss the show, shall we?

I don’t know why, but Mike got the idea that he wanted to see me high. Like I’d be even more fun to be around. As if that were even possible!

That led to a confession to Rollz, that the closest I got I ever got to even thinking about getting high was when they were here on one of their road trips and it was me and him outside. I don’t know why I finally came clean. There’s just something about him… I even thanked him AGAIN for reading “Scott and Kate” and pushing me in the direction of reaching out to the Duke of Stud.

Someone once asked me if I had a thing for Rollz, and it’s not like that. He’s a nice guy, and there is a connection, but no. Just. No. There’s a lot to love about him (at least the bits I’ve been privvy to), but yeah. I’ll pass. I’m too old for that kind of shit.

Besides, if I’m going to waste my time worrying about a relationship that isn’t going to happen, I’m going to focus on Johnlock. (From the description of a fan fic I’ve bookmarked to read later: “because god dam in a row boat that man has the most delicious arse I have ever seen.” Come on! That’s so much better than worrying about whether or not I’m going to get it on with someone ten years younger than me who has a girlfriend. By the way, I am TOTALLY fucking stealing god dam in a row boat. That’s awesome.)

Speaking of relationships, “THIS WEEK: HARTFORD!!” (Part one of my Cabin Pressure ‘trilogy’ - which finally has a name!) is really, truly, almost ready for another round of editing. I did a little bit of a rewrite. OK. I did a LOT of a rewrite. This is a bigger bitch than writing a Sherlock case fic (and THAT is a right bitch, my friends). I wish I knew what drove me to write fan fic for Cabin Pressure. *sigh*

And on that note, I need to prep for GISHWHES. Misha changed things up and it starts on Sunday. (Instead of November…) SUNDAY! I’m not ready for that level of insanity. Wish me luck!!!

Manic much?

August 03, 2013 :: 11:04 AM

and people wonder why johnlock is a thing

Rereading my last few entries has led me to believe that I REALLY shouldn’t blog when I’m manic.

I normally write somewhat terribly here (compared to my fan fic, work, etc.), but wow.

I fucked up loose/lose and that’s one of my BIGGEST pet peeves. And that whole thing about my Subie?

What. The. Fuck.

I would never, normally, call my Subaru a Subie. It’s a Bubaru. Always has been since the woman fucked up saying ‘Subaru’ during my very first Subaru’s very first oil change. Always will be.

For a car that survived high school, college, and the move to Ohio (so what, 10 years?), we saw a lot of things, lived through even more, and THAT’S still one of my top ten memories.

That says a lot, doesn’t it?


Any way… calmer emotions, a quieter head, today.

It’s good - I need to recharge before heading to NY tonight. Annie will be crushed. I’m staying with her brother and his girlfriend, but C offered first and I’m looking forward to getting to know her a little better.

I’ve needed the release of a good night, with good music, and better people in a while. This show couldn’t have come at a better time. I don’t care that we’re going back to NY in two weeks for Annie’s wedding… I NEED to be in upstate tonight like I need to breathe air.


Feeling better about work. It kind of ebbs and flows. I’m worried I’ve made the wrong choice still, and I know that’s my stupidity. I’m perfectly capable of doing this job. They love me. There are things I want to do there to really make everyone’s life easier. Month end’s not rocket science…

I know this is residual from the last job that didn’t work out because weeks 3 and 4 were when all hell broke loose then. Week three was not a good week (mania…), but that’s not directly job related so I think I’m OK.

Besides, if anything, the perks make it more tolerable than most jobs I’ve held. Free lunches every day and I’ll never pay more than $59 for a hotel room as long as it’s within our parent brand’s properties. (And they own some VERY NICE brands that I would never stay at because of the pricing.)

OK. I should go pack…

Here’s to good friends, good music, and a good time in Weedstock!


August 02, 2013 :: 8:13 PM

i needed some johnlock lovin’

OK. So.

I’ve been reading some pretty NSFW fan fic during my lunch breaks. (Oh my phone! I’m not completely moronic.) And this one piece, is… WOW! I can’t go into a lot of detail because then you’ll really lock me away in the funny farm, but anything that involves Sherlock falling off a coffee table multiple times (before deducing that if he can’t see the coffee table, he can’t fall off of it), and a thousand mentions of hedgehogs, will make me snicker.

I laughed so hard, I choked on my lunch. I laughed so hard I cried. I laughed so hard my boss had to come on and check on me.

I had no idea what to tell him. I mean, I’m not at the point where I could say to him, “Hey! I’m reading this ridiculously dirty piece of Sherlock BBC fan fiction and Sherlock keeps falling off the coffee table while trying to get buggered by John.” (And that’s the BARELY safe for work version.)


My car wasn’t nearly as bad as it could have been. Apparently, a loose gas cap was the cause of the check engine light. The sad thing is, we tested that theory about six times. Both of us. I’m not sure what the probability of both J and I leaving the gas cap too lose is, but we both loosened and tightened the damn thing.

Oh well. They fixed the weird idling issue, gave me new brakes… and I am ready to go to Weedstock tomorrow night!

It’s been too long since I’ve seen Black Mountain Symphony and if I had to, I’d fucking walk there this weekend.


I came home to five Cabin Pressure themed t-shirts (because the hubby of wonder is wonderful), and… THIS!


I have been not able to use words of more than one sound since I saw this the first time.

Oh. My. God. Mind. Blown. Feels. Explode. Can’t. Wait. Bee Cee’s Face! So. Cute. John’s. Face. Hair. Bad.


In other news… the hotel I work in was home to a meth lab. Some guy came in last year, rented some rooms and set up a one pot lab. Blew shit up, too. They’ve caught him and I guess he’s going to court or whatever, but MY HOTEL WAS HOME TO A METH LAB. How fucking cool is that?

What? You can’t tell me anything that cool has happened in your offices.

I figured it out!

July 20, 2013 :: 8:34 PM

how is it possible for him to be so perfect?



Remember those notes I took at the Matt Nathanson concert?

Particularly the note that said “look back at life, regret punches you in the face”?

I figured it out.

Took me forfuckingever, though.

I put the note right after the song title “Sky High Honey”, but since it was off of his new album, I didn’t have access to the song right away.

After listening to the song a few times, I heard these lines and…


I bet you’re laughing at some joke he told you. With his arm around your sunburnt shoulders. I spent the morning with my face against the window seat Looking down at all the things that got the best of me…

You know those moments when you look back at your life and regret punches you in the face? Yep.

I try not to regret the majority of things I’ve done/will do. Regret doesn’t do anything but make you feel like shit. It’s done. It’s over. Move on.

That said, I do regret a few things. But they’re important and I don’t want to delete them.

I regret not getting to know the woman my father loved so much.

I regret not going home when he was in the hospital - even though I was forbidden to. (You didn’t want to fuck with my father when he pulled rank. Remember when I talked about the games of “You Lose”?)

That’s it.


At least, it’s all I’m going to admit to right now…

Anyhoo, to get back on track:

I was doing OK until I heard… You wait too long, you never leave

That line, though? That fucking line?

Absolutely killed me. (Kicked me right in the feels, for you tumblr folk.)

If you don’t know why go spend some time in the archives.

I made a very conscious decision not to look for work at international companies unless the position was perfect. It wasn’t worth suffering at a shitty job hoping to hell they’d sponsor me to move overseas… and of course, because I inherited the Nelson Black Cloud of Doom (trademark pending), the companies I would have killed to work for passed me over because of…

wait for it…


Well, fuck you, too.

(Why do you think I got so pissy every. single. time. it came up in an interview?)

I don’t quite regret the decision to apply for jobs at local companies. It’s better knowing I don’t have a chance in hell to get sponsored by my employer instead of killing time only to find out it will never happen.

Is it stupid logic?


All it means in the long run is that the move to London just became that much more difficult logistically.

Financially, we’re getting (back) to a position where we might be able to cross the pond more often than not. If I stay at the hotel chain, I get a really good rate at any brand under their corporate umbrella, even the international properties. Of course, worst case scenario, I have friends who would probably be more than willing to let us crash at their house if need be for a week. (This constant vacationing in the UK assumes that we don’t want to go anywhere else. Germany’s been brought up and tabled in favor of another trip to London. A few times.)

More importantly, if we can figure out how to do it, there’s always the option to use the 6 month visitor visa.


Why not pack up and move every six months or so? Snowbirds do it. Why can’t we?


Unrelated. Kinda.

I’m the end of a Hitchcock movie: A little dark and a lot confusing. I’m the last of the worst pretenders. So lost, so lost…

(Since I’m listening to Matt and this song came on, I figured why the hell not? “Mission Bells” is my favorite song. This week.)

Aggressive Scrabble and jello underpants.

July 12, 2013 :: 7:00 PM

matt nathanson :: ll bean, freeport, me :: 07.04.2013

OK… let me preface this by saying HOLY. MOTHER. OF. FUCK.

L.L. Bean does free concerts over the summer and they’ve had some pretty big names. This year, I was clued into the fact that Matt Nathanson was playing there on the 4th. I’m not a die hard fan, but I have a few of his albums and I really like them. They’re good background music because they’re kind of slow and chill. But, yeah, nothing I’m going to know 100%, as opposed to, I don’t know, like R.E.M. (I will always think of that guy in Cleveland who was so impressed that I knew every single song R.E.M. performed that night.)

Not only is Matt an incredible musician, he’s pretty hilarious in between songs. (I took notes! I don’t know why, but I’m mostly glad I did. You’ll see why I say ‘mostly’.)

Before he sang “Run”, he pointed out that it’s normally sung as a duet and that it’s about “an aggressive game of scrabble - the kind where you lock yourself in a hotel room and don’t come out for three days.” However, when he sings it by himself, it’s more like playing solitaire. (I think the family friendly version was a bazillionty million times better than what he could have said!) I will never be able to look at a game of Scrabble the same way again.

I was trying to use the notes app on my iPhone to keep track of the set list and make some notes. I was more successful with some notes than others. I *think* one note is supposed to say “look back at life, regret punches you in the face”... but I have no idea what that means, or what the point of it was. It must have seemed really deep at that particular moment.

While talking about “Room @ the End of the World”, he said that L.L. Bean was definitely where you wanted to be for the zombie apocalypse. He’s not wrong.

Another WTF note: “jello underpants”.

note to self: CONTEXT!


It was also an amazing day because after 10+ years of “knowing” her online, I finally got to meet E in person.

It’s so weird to see someone in person for the first time and fall into conversation easily because you’ve followed their life over the years, and vice versa.

I don’t think that feeling will ever get old.

Dog bless teh interwebs. Srsly.


Sound check:
Car Crash
Under Pressure
Wedding Dress
To the Beat of Our Noisy Hearts

Mission Bells
To the Beat of Our Noisy Hearts
Modern Love
Detroit Waves (featuring The Doors’ “Break on Through”, Rolling Stones’ “Paint It Black”, and “Amazing Grace”)
Sky High Honey
Room @ the End of the World (featuring Whitney Houston’s “I Wanna Dance with Somebody”)
The Boxer (Simon and Garfunkle cover)
Car Crash (featuring U2’s “I Still Haven’t Found What I’m Looking For”)
Wedding Dress
Under Pressure (Queen/David Bowie cover)
Come On Get Higher

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