You must stay drunk on writing so reality cannot destroy you.

I certainly don’t write for the money.

In case you were wondering, the 2012-2022 NHL CBA is 540 pages of the driest legalese to ever exist.

I don’t even know how I got a copy of it, other than the fact that I worked in the NHL. There’s no real reason for me to have it, but I’m glad I do.

I make no secret of the fact that I write a lot of M/M fan fiction or read a lot of it.

Seriously, my Kindle Unlimited account history bounces between horror and gay fiction. I tried joining two different book clubs… I figure life is hard enough; why suffer through a book club’s suggestions? Read a biography? Why? Nobody interests me that much.

Anyhoo… professional writers will say that you need to read a ton to be able to write better. I don’t know if it’s true or not, but I’ve always been a reader. Maybe that’s why I love to write. I write the stories I want to read. The ones that only exist in my head. Do I ever finish them? Rarely, but the writing is what’s important. Even if I have six WIPs right now, it feels good to write until I get bored with the plot or stuck because my characters don’t play nice.

Wow. That went in a completely different direction.

Let’s try this again:
I make no secret of the fact that I write a lot of M/M fan fiction or read a lot of it.

Seriously, my Kindle Unlimited account history bounces between horror and gay fiction. “Professional” writers will say that you need to read a ton to be able to write better.

So.

For whatever reason, there’s a TON of hockey romances being written. Gay fiction is not immune to this phenomenon, and well… I’m in the middle of a quest to read EVERY. SINGLE. BOOK. in this very specific sub-genre. (Sub-sub-genre? Whatever.)

Which brings me full circle to the CBA.

I hate world building. HATE IT. It’s the main reason I love fan fiction. Unless it’s an AU, there’s no reason for it.

Everyone who would read Harry Potter fan fic knows the stories, either from the movies or the books.

Everyone who would read Teen Wolf fan fic is probably familiar with the MTV show (not the 1980s movie. Oh, fuck, no.) - except for me. I had NO idea what I was getting into when I followed some random tag on AO3 and wound up reading Sciles. (YUK!). There was a deep dive into the show and yeah, I did it ass backwards, but I quickly fell in love with Sterek, Steter, Stetopher. (OK. So I’m obsessed with Stiles. What about it?)

Taking Harry Potter out of Hogwarts and putting him in a non-magical, hockey, universe seems relatively simple. He and Draco are on separate teams, they hook up over the All-Star break, then they hook up every time they play each other… smexy times happen, and then they wind up on the same team, and not so smexy stuff happens before the guaranteed HEA.

Except.

I can’t write the same sort of hockey fic the others write - where they gloss over the world because people have a basic understanding of pro sports. Some of them write beautiful descriptions of the game, but leave out everything and anything that helps show the true behind the scenes life of a hockey team.

I’ve worked in Community Relations, worked on the arena management side, and worked in an accounting department for both an arena and a team.

I understand entry level contracts and the salary cap. I understand the fear of being traded after making a city your home. I understand the pressure of winning a Cup.

I understand players and the game in a way that the other authors don’t.

And it’s leading me to get bogged down in world building.

I know it’s worth it, because it’s what I feel is missing every time I read one of the hockey books. (See? I write what I want to read.)

I’ve got team names, mascots, schedules, QMJHL / OHL teams, prep schools and colleges… I’m working on the NHL Draft and teammates right now.

I’ve got Harry being from Roxbury, a sort of rough Boston suburb. He’s poor, living with the Dursley’s and generally looking to escape - just like the ‘real’ Harry. Draco, on the other hand, is rich and privileged, and also looking to escape.

It’s important to me that people know how the Draft actually works and what an entry level contract looks like. What being bounced between the minors and the NHL looks like because that’s Harry’s path through the world of the NHL. A lot of those things will inform his decisions and make him the person he becomes. (Much like learning magic and facing down Voldemort every year forced him to become Harry Potter, the Savior of the Wizarding World.)

But, holy fuck, it is hard.

I’m a pantser. Never a plotter.

Writing something this detailed is so outside my comfort zone that I’m actually kind of enjoying it. I do need to plot the fuck out of it, though. Otherwise, nothing would make sense and I’m writing the same kind of ‘they meet, fall in love, become afraid to come out, love conquers all’ bulllshit I’m currently reading. (Yeah. I said bullshit. I’m trying to find that unicorn in all the gay hockey fiction… but we all know unicorns don’t exist. Won’t stop me from reading every single book, though.)

I’m also fighting the point of view issue.

In one of my HP fan fic groups, there was a HUGE discussion over POV in fics. Apparently, they have to be 3rd person limited since that’s how JKR wrote the story. (Fun fact, the first chapter of the first book - Philosopher’s Stone, thank you very much - is actually 3rd person omniscient; it’s a quick and dirty bit of world building, but as effective as anything I’ve ever come across.)

I like writing in 1st person, 3rd person omniscient when the mood strikes, but I can’t figure out how to tell this particular story. Do I write it strictly from Harry’s POV? Do I sprinkle in a little Malfoy? Does Harry tell his story in his own words or is it told from a distance?

I’m leaning towards 3rd person limited, because reasons, but it feels too limited to me. (HA!!!!)

I don’t know.

I sat down to write this entry thinking it would help me figure shit out, but now I’m more unsettled than before.

Oh well.

Maybe I’ll work on some Ukrainian stuff and maybe the website I started like a month ago and let this stuff get worked through subconsciously?

That actually sounds like a pretty good plan…

So yeah.

До побачення!