Summa cum laude and I can’t read a headline…

I seriously pictured Nine (I don’t know why him specifically) doing some sort of raiding in a jail with Bin Laden. And I don’t even know what the fuck that’s supposed to mean. I think tumblr has destroyed my brain. Too much time with the fan girls, speaking our pidgin language and thinking/writing in British English has completely ruined my command of American English.

——

“Okay, this was an adorable story! I really enjoyed it. Thanks so much for writing :D”

I took a correspondence writing course waaaaaaaay back when we lived in Ohio. For the children in the audience, a correspondence course was when you snail mailed your homework to your teacher. Online courses didn’t really exist back then. Plus, with writing, it kind of made more sense - she could underline, write corrections, etc. and make it easier to understand the notes.

Anyhoo… I found the course’s notebook, filled with the writing assignments, my turned in homework, and the teacher’s comments. (That class is where “Scott and Kate” came from, and maybe one day, I’ll suck it up and make it public.) I went back and read all the assignments (write from the antagonist’s point of view, do a character study of your main characters, blah, blah, blah…). I’d forgotten how much work it took to flesh out realistic characters, but looking back at how it all came together, it was worth it.

All the reactions to my assignment were high praise. Such high praise that it pissed me off to where I basically accused her - in my final review of the class - of blowing smoke up my arse. After she chewed me out for being a complete dick to her, she reminded me that her one CONSISTENT (and pretty much only) complaint about my writing was the way I tend to write in choppy sentences. I had no idea I was doing it back then, but I’ve discovered since that its my voice. It’s just who I am when I write. Whether or not it’s on my blog or in fiction.

Fascinating.

I’m still amazed that I’m getting positive feedback on my fan fic. (I still feel ridiculous admitting that.) People are favoriting my story, giving me kudos, following my story (which is pointless - it’s all been uploaded - but sweet nonetheless), and most importantly, favoriting ME and following ME. Not my story. ME. As a writer.

Dude. It blows my fucking mind like you don’t even know.

I guess in a way, I feel like people are being kind. That I don’t deserve the praise. That I’m a completely shitty writer. (See? Choppy sentences.)

Once day, I’ll accept that I can write, and that people aren’t just blowing smoke.

But it ain’t gonna be today…