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Saturday, May 04, 2019

#kissesforbill

sweaty selfie :: big cat 5k :: palm beach zoo

This might be my last 5K with my husband. We normally walk them together, but he seems less and less interested. Plus, I want to start running them and he’s not going to do that. (Yet?)

On to Quidditch…

The dementors started running on the 2nd, giving the House teams a head start. Despite not being a competitive group, I’ve been outdoing myself to get the miles. I want to prove to myself more than anything that I can survive Quidditch and push myself to the point where the house teams are fighting themselves to get me in the Fall Quidditch “draft”.

Seriously.

Thursday, it was pouring so I hopped on the treadmill and planned to do a couch to 5K work out. Did that. Wasn’t tired, so I kept walking. Then it became a game to see how many miles I could go or for how long before I totally crapped out.

(This is the FUCK IT factor at work, by the way)

I crushed a little over 6 miles - a 10K.

Yesterday, I did a little over 5 miles.

Today, I did 3.3 at the Big Cat 5K and then hopped on the treadmill for another 1.7 as soon as we got home. No lie. It was the dementor power hour - all miles are doubled - so how could I sit on the couch? (FUCK IT! I can keep going…)

Tonight, I’m planning on taking the dog for a walk. Hopefully, the next PH will fall when I’m ready to drop my next batch of miles.

And for what it’s worth, I’m in 10th place for total miles in our group of 60. TENTH.

I’ve never done sixteen miles consecutively unless I was at Universal. I’ve done those sixteen in three days - thirteen which count towards PHRC medals. I’ve already claimed my last two 5Ks. I have a bunch of half marathon medals to complete. If I keep this up, I’ll have completed all the Potterhead/Whovian medals I have before Quidditch ends.

I’ll work on distances and speed soon. Right now I want to focus more on stamina. Making sure my fat ass doesn’t keel over, that sort of thing. I’ve been dropping weight, which is helping, so I’ve got that in my favour. Less weight means less strain on my knees and they’ve always been the first to get screwed up, whether it’s volleyball, marching band, skiing… I so much as think of being active and my knees act up.

I’m going to finish Quidditch and then go back to my training plans. Losing three weeks in my training won’t make a big deal because right now I’m paced to peak in early November. If I can shift peaking closer to December, I’ll still be fine for the Disney Half.

I think I’ve completely lost my mind, and I’m not sure I want to find it….

Posted by Matty on 05/04 at 02:26 PM
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Tuesday, December 04, 2018

Rah! Rah! Ravenclaw!!!!

hogwarts running club :: ravenclaws :: universal orlando fun run :: 01-dec-2018

So. A lot has happened since September, but succeeding at my three words is the one thing I’m most proud of.

My three words for this year were 5K, fandom, and language. It’s only the beginning of December, but I have crushed those.

1) 5K - let’s see… this year, I’ve done three IRL 5Ks. I’ve logged a ton of miles since joining the HRC (79.64 to be exact). That doesn’t count the hundreds of miles I’ve walked around Universal. (Yes. HUNDREDS.)

Between the Hogwarts Running Club and the Whovian Running Club, I’ve earned 7 medals. I’m impressed with myself - that’s a total of 35 miles. Which means, if you’re doing the math, that I logged 44 miles more than I gave myself credit for. My rule is that I have to walk the miles in consecutive days (if it’s a longer race) to earn the medal and unfortunately, the dog’s walking route is only 2 miles, so there’s a lot of days that don’t count because I can’t always take him for a walk on consecutive days no matter how much I want to.

Doesn’t matter because 80 miles is 80 miles more than I would have done without the HRC.

Crushed it.


2) Fandom - hmmm… well. That photo up there? Those are the Ravenclaws. From the Hogwarts Running Club. (Harry Potter fans until the very end.) I didn’t meet many of them in person - damn anxiety- but I recognise the faces from their FB profile pics. I also friended one of them on FB, which is huge for me. I don’t friend just anyone, but I completely love Alexander. He’s good people. Too bad he’s in Belgium because I would totally adopt him.

I’m still writing fan fiction. Still mostly Harry Potter because Drarry is my thing, but I branched out to Teen Wolf again and I’ll be starting a Yuri!!! on Ice one soon. (Holy shit, dude. WHY was it only 12 episodes?!?! I am obsessed with that damn anime. Do you hear me? OBSESSED.)  Plus, I’m hanging out more in a FB Harry Potter fan fiction group. No friends there, yet, but there’s potential.

I cosplayed several times as a Ravenclaw student… And, and, and I’m learning how to sew for more cosplay options. Not to mention, I have a whole crap ton of Harry Potter themed fabric that is making its way into my closet in one form or another.

Crushed it.

3) Language - this one was hard. I didn’t meet my goals, because reasons. BUT in the last two months, I’ve picked up my Ukrainian studies with a vengeance. I’m currently addicted to learning cursive which is a nice way to mix things up. I’ve gotten in this terrible habit of writing down vocab words in cursive and then looking them up later. Hoo-boy, is it a struggle some times to read what I wrote. Cyrillic cursive looks like a drunk 5 year old writing prescriptions, but my handwriting is getting better because I have to focus so hard on the letter forms.

I’m also fighting my way through the first chapter of Harry Potter for the third (fourth?) time. I’m remembering more words and am getting better at deciphering entire sentences without constantly looking up vocab. I will say this much - character names look very different in Cyrillic than they do in English.

I’m thinking about skipping forward to see how “I am Lord Voldemort / Tom Marvolo Riddle” works out. The French translation is different (Tom Elvis Jedusor) and there’s a lot of people out there who say it should have been “Mr. Tom, a dildo lover”. So, yeah. Curious as to how the Ukrainian translation handles it.

Late to the game, but I’m giving myself the win because lately, I’m kicking some serious ass.

Crushed it.

(HA HA HA!!!!! I spelt “drive” wrong - it’s прівіт-драйв, not прівіт-дdайв (because that is decidedly not a Ukrainian letter!)

Posted by Matty on 12/04 at 07:23 PM
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Sunday, October 08, 2017

Reflections on life in SoFlo

omg, i think i will always love drarry headcanons like this

SO…

I called my boss a dick at work once. Twice. Um… maybe three times? I meant it lovingly (kinda) and he tells the story to EVERYONE.

Including my husband’s boss. (Who was amused that I found my tribe because it means the hubby won’t be leaving him anytime soon.)

I’ve been thinking a lot about the decisions I made to take this job because I’m working with someone who is an entire generation younger and took this job specifically because it was the only company that would hire him. He is fresh out of college and moved from NJ to take a chance on this job. He still lived at home and is now living with a family friend.

I had to sell my house, move my husband and leave what few friends I’d been able to make/reconnect with. I left coworkers behind who needed to have someone to vent to and I left behind a huge piece of my past. I’ll never be able to go to York, ME when I need to be near my father. I’ll never be able to go to Connecticut to yell at my mother’s grave… it’s like when I moved to Ohio for a job in the same industry, but…

It’s much easier this time. I don’t have the same regrets. I’ll miss the things I left behind, LIKE WINTER, but I get to spend 41 nights in my happiest of happy places and I can’t ask for much more. And that’s not even taking into consideration the limitless trips we can take to my other happy place. Going to Universal Orlando for Halloween Horror Nights with our CFO was definitely an eye-opening experience. Being able to go back to see Hogwarts lit up for Christmas and being able to go to the Celebration of Harry Potter without having to worry about flights and extended periods of time off of work.

What’s not making things much easier this time, is finding a fucking house.

I think we lucked out when we built our last house. It had everything we wanted in a package we could afford. Home hunting in South Florida isn’t nearly as easy. It’s a choice between dirt roads and land or zero lot lines and little yards. Don’t even get me started on the fucking HOAs and gated communities that are everywhere.

So far, we’re on house #3. We actually placed an offer on a house that needed a lot of work. We were willing to go full price rather than get into a bidding war, because we thought our issues with the house were cosmetic. It was determined some things were structural, so we walked. The second house we were thinking about writing an offer on had an HOA that would only allow pets 10 lbs and under. THAT IS NOT A PET.

House 3 is also in an HOA which prides itself on being relaxed. (So, our biggest issues would be paint colours and being able to do exterior things like replacing windows or installing a fence.) We drove through the neighbourhood again today and realised that, comparatively, this house is definitely a steal at its current price because it needs a lot of work. We’re willing to do the work, but I want to go back and get a second look at what needs to be done ASAP and what we can do over time before we make an offer.

It feels weird to be setting down roots here. Not that I think I’m leaving my job anytime soon, but I remember how hopeless I felt when I lived in Ohio. How terrible I felt when I bought that first house. I didn’t want to put roots down there, but I didn’t feel I had a choice.

I have a choice here - and I’m happy to stay. Even if it means I’ll never get to drive through another Nor’Easter again and have to deal with hurricanes instead.

Posted by Matty on 10/08 at 03:19 PM
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Monday, March 20, 2017

Forty two

OE at MSG - 03.04.17 :: easily the best concert i’ve ever been to. ever.

Today’s my Hitchhiker’s Birthday… it’s been kind of meh, to be honest.

Saturday was the 25th anniversary of my mother’s death and I decided to go to CT. I ran in almost knee-deep snow (in sneakers!) to her grave and spent 20 minutes spewing every negative thought I’ve had during the course of those 25 years. Yeah, it was fucked up, but it was SO freeing.

After that, I stood at the side of the road and read a blog entry to my grandparents. It was the blog entry I wrote about our trip to Lviv. My pronunciation sucked, but the thought was there.

Totally random - next to my usual parking spot, they were preparing for a burial. It was a woman I’d grown up with, a close friend of my grandparents. Wasn’t ready for that.

Another totally random thing - my uncle’s been dead for FIVE YEARS and the stone hasn’t been updated yet. FIVE FUCKING YEARS. WHAT THE FUCK IS MY AUNT DOING?!?!!?!?

Once I got my fill of hanging out with dead people, I went to my little brother’s house for a birthday lunch. It was a good time. We went for a walk and shared some deep things that we both needed to unload. I don’t want to go another six months before I see him again… I’m not sure I can go another six months without seeing him again.

Then, I went to a BMS show in Cambridge. So nice for there to be a show only an hour from home. Their drummer’s been problematic since he started and this show was particularly horrid.  It wasn’t helped by the fact that the old drummer was there. He was singing because one of the other members had laryngitis and it did not go over well when he pointed out that the drummer was too loud or too fast.

It was a nice break from the shitshow that my life is. I’m working through a lot of things right now and I’m not sure what’s being exacerbated by the bipolar and what’s just really fucked up. It’s harder to make decisions when everything is murky. Either way, I knew which decisions need to be made and I know what my decision is… I just don’t have the balls to pull the trigger and walk away from a situation I might be reading wrong.

So. Yeah.

Я не здамся без бою.—> The story of my life right now. *sigh*

Posted by Matty on 03/20 at 09:09 PM
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Monday, November 07, 2016

Overwhelmed

rest in peace, coach

It’s been a whole lot of death and gloom around me lately.

Death apparently no longer happens in threes. It’s expanded to five, but we’re all kind of waiting for number six to show up.

It started with a co-worker’s cousin dying in a fiery car wreck. The body was so damaged, they had to use dental records.

Then, Coach Marshall died.

I’m still having a hard time processing that. I went to the memorial, and I thought that would give me the closure I needed, but it didn’t. Coach was a good man. A bit troubled, but who amongst us isn’t? The UConn hockey program wouldn’t have been the same without him and his stubbornness, that laser focus on proving that anything less than Hockey East wasn’t acceptable, the drive and determination to get the ice rink enclosed. I was fortunate to be there for so much of the early (later) days. I was instrumental in doing much of the groundwork for the fundraising of the indoor rink, and he taught me so much about kissing ass without actually needing to pucker up. I wouldn’t be the person I am without his influence…

It’s hard to think about the fact that there’ll never be another note, another email, another set of tickets left at the door because “I know you don’t have anything better to do this weekend.”

Maybe once hockey season is over, the wound will heal. At the very least, time and distance will numb the pain. 

As if that hadn’t rocked my world enough, another coworker lost his son. Cancer. A bunch of us went to the memorial service, and it was suitably awkward. It’s well known that I don’t like to be touched by people, and I became the butt of a few jokes when Bob got in not one, but two, hugs. Fuck it. It made him laugh, and that’s what matters.

Found out today another co-worker lost his sister (sister-in-law?), and yet another service tech’s best friend’s sister killed herself.

Dear 2016, STOP FUCKING KILLING PEOPLE. You can make it to the end of the year, can’t you?

—————

We’re going to Lviv in a few days. My Ukrainian is shitty, but I should be functional. I’m still missing some key vocabulary, and I’m not happy about it, but I don’t know what else to do. I’m taking lessons five days a week and cramming in homework and translating my Harry Potter fanfic whenever possible. I’m also trying to read other Ukrainian fanfics. I read a Littlefinger / Sansa pairing that was… eh. Right now, I’m working on a Littlefinger / Caitlyn Stark fic. Also ‘eh’, but beggars can’t be choosers.

The only thing that’s keeping me from totally losing my shit is the fact that my tutor thinks I’m doing extremely well.

Related - this last weekend, I wandered down to the Armpit of the Eastern Seaboard (New Jersey) for a Ukrainian genealogical conference. In a room full of 80 Ukrainians, it felt like I was the only one that understood Ukrainian. It was weird… a few of the presenters were like “Oh, this site is only in Ukrainian. Just google translate it! It’ll be close enough.”

NO. NO. NO. NO.

I’m not sure if that was the worst or if the Cyrillic handwriting class was. This woman kept trying to transliterate the letters. That’s all fine and dandy, but in my experience, leaning on transliteration when you’re first learning is terrible. You’re never going to understand the language if you don’t dive in and start using the Cyrillic alphabet. Sorry. That’s the only way to do it, if you want to do it properly.

In preparation for our trip, I even gave in and ate the kapusta and kielbasa, a vareneky, and some borscht. Unfortunately, both the borscht and the kapusta were too acidic for me (woo! acid reflux!), but I ate the entire vareneky. If you know what a fussy eater I am, you know how huge that is for me.

—————

In other news, there’s drama at work (when is there not?). I’m not sure where I fit in, but I know what I want and I know how to get there. It’s just a matter of how many bodies will pile up as the drama continues… and I hope I’m not collateral damage. We’ll find out, won’t we?

Fuck. I just want a nice, normal, boring job.

—————

Election Day is tomorrow.

I CAN’T FUCKING WAIT FOR THIS SHIT SHOW TO BE OVER.

OMG. I can’t even.

It was like a bad joke yesterday: a (male) Brookah, a black man, and a woman were holding signs for Trump. How the fuck can a black man support a guy who is endorsed by the fucking KKK? And let’s not even get into the whole sexual harassment / assault shit going on with the women.

To prove that the universe is paying attention, though, we have a neighbor that has a big Trump sign in his yard. Came home the other night to find that his pickup (with a massive Trump sticker) had been set on fire and melted some of the siding on his house.

I get a little weepy when I think about voting for Hillary, but I don’t know if it’s because she could be the first female president or if it’s because I’m so disgusted that she’s the lesser of two evils.

I really wonder what we look like to the rest of the world…

Posted by Matty on 11/07 at 09:34 PM
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